by

What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 36
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Latvia
Highest education received: Some college (not currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Translator
What’s your current relationship status? In a serious relationship (open)
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Hetero-flexible
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 50+
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

First blowjob

How long ago did this hookup happen? 4 months ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? Short fling

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I found her profile on couchsurfing while looking for a place to stay in Vienna searching for the keyword “vegan”. (Disclaimer: I don’t use couchsurfing as a dating site!) and was looking forward to meeting a person with similar interests: massage, veganism, atheism, sexual positivity, gender, etc. She’s much younger than me, about 12 years or so, a student, queer, feminist, multi-lingual, intelligent and fun.
I arrived in Vienna from a very long road trip heading south by car. I was looking forward to a shower and a place to stay. To be honest, because I was so exhausted and my shoulders and leg hurt so bad, I was fantasizing about getting “a massage and a blowjob” to relax, but never imagined it would actually happen, mostly because I thought she was a lesbian. When we met we connected pretty quickly, and while shopping for groceries and cooking, we talked about many fascinating topics including her identifying as pansexual, our sexual experience, bondage, s&m, STIs, queer & transgender people, feminism, massage techniques, etc.
After dinner and wine she gave me a massage and we went to a party together where she made out with a friend of hers she had had a crush on. I was happy for her that she got to hook up with someone and the party was quite fun. We had a few drinks, so we were a bit tipsy when we left. When we got home she offered me her bed since it was late to pull out the couch. We cuddled and talked a bit and somehow our conversation turned to oral sex. She had confessed earlier that day that she felt rather awkward with men because she had almost no experience with them. I half-jokingly offered myself for practice. After a moment she said she wasn’t sure, so we just talked a bit more and then went to sleep cuddling.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? The next day I went off to get things done in Vienna and expected her to be going out clubbing that night. I told her I’d stay in because I needed to get up early. When I got back to her place I was surprised to find her still at home and in her pajamas. She said she was too tired from the party the night before to go out.
After dinner again she gave me a massage, this time on my leg because it was twitching from the long drive and lack of exercise. After the massage she started cuddling with me again and we kissed. We started making out and touching each other. She was on her period so she wouldn’t let me touch her below her underwear. She started kissing my chest and worked her way down and started giving me a blowjob. I could tell she was taking her time and trying really hard. It felt amazing. She was licking my balls and the shaft and then started sucking while stroking me. There were only a few awkward moments, but she was very attentive to my moans and groans and learned really quickly. I came in her mouth and she swallowed my cum. She crawled back up to me and cuddled close, kissing me and said, “I feel so empowered!”. I found that sentence cute, but also nice to know that she experienced it that way. I told her it was amazing.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? Oral sex. She was really good. Afterwards we talked about it and I told her what she did well, because she was inexperienced with men. It ended in an amazing orgasm.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one

Did your partner have an orgasm? No

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? It felt really good to cuddle afterwards and we’re still in contact. I could have stayed with her again a month later, but I arrived in Vienna too late. Based on our chats I’m pretty sure we’ll hook up again some day in the future. Also, she said she has only been able to cum from oral sex from her ex-girlfriend and no-one else after her. I’d love to help change that, in case it hasn’t since then. I look forward to seeing her again.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None, Discussed STI testing history

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, Hoping or expecting it would lead to something more, Making new friends

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I told my girlfriend and she was happy for me, but also told me she wished I were home soon because she wanted me to cuddle with her.
I also told another friend and he said something like “awesome”, but not much more.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? 3 things:
1. That we remained in contact and became friends.
2. That the blowjob was so good.
3. That she was so proud of herself.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? nothing

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? No

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? To be honest, I have rarely been able to have casual sex with such a young woman without some regrets or desire for more being involved. Usually one or the other person regrets doing something with a friend, has stronger emotions and doesn’t feel comfortable not being in a committed relationship.
Also, if I don’t connect intellectually and physically before sex, the first sex is rarely really good, so I prefer to get to know someone before hooking up.
When people hook up they often regret it afterwards even if the sex itself was good. I think a lot of this has to do with slut-shaming and fear of abandonment.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? It’s a great opportunity for people to tell their stories and to let the world know about important issues such as STIs, risks involving taking drugs before sex, consent issues and the possibilities for people to be happy in non-monogamous relationships and hook-ups.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!

What’s Your Fantasy? Click here to be part of the largest survey on sexual fantasies ever!

Comments