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What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 28
What’s your race/ethnicity? Black
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? U.S.
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? Speech-language pathologist
What’s your current relationship status? Dating casually
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Very
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 50
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

First Orgasm from the Dick

How long ago did this hookup happen? 3 years ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Single

How would you best classify this hookup? Sex with an ex

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a year

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? My ex had dumped me about a month prior; we had dated for 6 months. He was 10 years my senior and well below my standards on paper, but my type on a surface level–tall, slim, dark-skinned, dreadlocks, laid back demeanor. I was at a low point in my life and the amazing sex kept me around. His love was very authentic, and I got much more emotionally attached than I had initially intended when I first met him.

His reason for the breakup was to “not hold me back” and to let me “live my life.” That post-breakup period was the most painful time of my life, but I knew deep down that letting each other go was best for both of us. I still had strong feelings for him at the time of our hookup.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? It was a few days after my birthday. He contacted me and told me he had a gift waiting for me, and invited me to come over (his mother’s house, where he lived) to get it. I was expecting the “gift” to just be his dick, but when I got to the house he handed me a box that had a watch inside. He said he had also bought flowers for me but he couldn’t get in touch with me on my birthday to give them to me then (still don’t know what happened there, but whatever).

There was incense burning in the den, which was unusual for him. I told him I liked the smell. I sat kind of far away from him and we smoked a blunt. He told me was dating someone else now, which I already knew. I told him I was ready to let him go, as he needed to put in time and effort towards the new woman without my interference. This was bullshit but I was just glad to be in his presence again, so I only felt contentment at the time. He stared at me without saying a word. The way he looked at me was always a mixture of love and lust.

He asked, “Why are you so far away?”

I got up and moved to sit beside him.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We started making out and he instructed me to take my clothes off. I stood up in front of him and pulled off my tank top and unhooked my bra, and he groaned slightly at the sight of my tits. He stood up to suck on my nipples. When he sat back down, he started removing his clothes as I struggled to pull off my tight jeans. I was a little embarrassed as my pussy wasn’t freshly shaved, but he looked at it at eye level and began to lick my clit. I grabbed his dreads and moaned. I returned the favor, giving him head as he leaned back in the black leather couch.

He then laid me on my back and entered me at an angle in missionary, with one of my legs against the back of the couch and the other on the seat. He pumped in and out of me with a steady, medium rhythm, like he always did. That tempo drove me crazy because it was like he had the patience to please me, while taking his time to enjoy the pussy as well. Eventually he started stroking harder at the same speed…falling into me now almost vertically with every stroke. He couldn’t keep his eyes off his dick going in and out.

I was looking too and whispered (so as to not wake up his family), “Look at that fucking dick…your dick is so hard right now!”

It seemed like his dick got even harder after I said that. Eventually I wanted to switch positions so I laid back on the couch while he knelt on the floor in front of me and entered me with my legs around his waist. But the angle wasn’t right at first so I put my legs over his shoulders and it was perfect.

He started thrusting and I said, “Make my titties bounce.”

So he gave a few quick thrusts while looking at my breasts move up and down in slow waves from their fullness. Pretty soon he caught that steady rhythm again and it seemed to last forever. I remember thinking this was probably the last time we would ever fuck, and I abandoned all my thoughts.

I arched my back and looked up to the ceiling as I grunted with each stroke. This was unusual for me, as I’m usually a moaner or dirty talker. I lowered my ass further off the seat of the couch to improve the angle even more. Every time his dick hit the deepest point it could go, I felt a wave of sensation rush through my entire body, limbs and all. Pretty soon I felt myself arching even more and my head tilted back even further, to the point where I could almost look at the back of the couch. My grunts stopped and I simply gasped a few times with strained breath. I felt my pussy contract on his dick, and remain contracted for several seconds.

“I feel you, baby,” he said.

Normally I cannot contract my pussy around dick at will, so I didn’t know what was happening with my body. After my orgasm subsided, I slowly realized that this had, in fact, been an orgasm. I relaxed and let him finish for himself. After a few minutes, he pulled out and came on my stomach and tits.

By the time he returned with a wet, soapy washcloth, I had sunk to the floor. As we cleaned up, he said, “You fucked the shit out of me.” I didn’t think of it that way, but I took it as a compliment.

After we were dressed, we watched TV as I snuggled up against him with his arm around me. I mentioned to him that I was twitching slightly (this freaked me out a bit since I had so little control over my body, even after the sex was over!). He just gave a little laugh, probably proud of himself. I think we both knew that this would be our last moment of real intimacy, so we savored it. He gave me a kiss goodbye as I left.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? My ex and I had car sex a few times after that. Fun, but not nearly as intimate. I spent the next several months suffering and trying to get over him. I even went crazy and said some hurtful things to him in an attempt to sabotage his relationship.

Now I’m in a much better place and completely over him. Right before I moved to a new state, he took me to lunch and we chatted. I was curious about how our sex compared to sex with his girl, and he said that his most memorable sexual experiences were with me. His smile and the way he shook his head, reminiscing, gave away his sincerity. I suggested one more go for old time’s sake before I moved, but he said he couldn’t make any promises. When we walked out to the parking lot, we kissed as he grabbed my ass.

“Your ass is still soft,” he said.
“Your lips are still soft,” I said, and he leaned in for one more kiss.

And that was that. We’re now friends on Facebook, and he seems happy in his relationship. He texted me last year to wish me a happy birthday.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Withdrawal

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, To cheer myself up, I was feeling lonely

How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did you consume? Marijuana, hashish

How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Marijuana, hashish

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? No one

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Having my first orgasm through penetration. I honestly didn’t think that would ever happen. Also, just getting some decent closure with my ex.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? That it couldn’t happen again!

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I realized that I need a strong emotional connection, along with complete mental relaxation to orgasm with a partner. I’ve had plenty of fun casual sex experiences, but I had accepted that I was never going to orgasm in those types of encounters.

I also realized that nothing is actually “wrong” with me because of this. Until I fall in love again, I’m perfectly fine with getting myself off with my vibrator. 🙂

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I’ve been quite conflicted about the morality of casual sex. In my younger days I would do it without a second thought, oblivious to society’s opinions about it. But once I got word that society actually disapproves of that type of behavior from women, I started feeling increasingly ashamed of myself.

I believe casual sex has negatively affected my view of men, which affects my ability to form relationships with men. At some point casual sex with multiple partners was no longer fulfilling to me.

Currently I’d like a relationship where I’m not settling, but I know that takes a while to find. So in the meantime, I’d like to get laid consistently (by one partner), but my experience with this has been that men aren’t guaranteed to stick around after they get a sample of your pussy. Do fuck buddies still exist? If both partners enjoy the sex the first time, wouldn’t it make sense to continue the sex?

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I love reading the stories! I think it’s a great way to normalize casual sex and diminish the stigma. It makes me feel not so alone about my own experiences. It’s also interesting to read the male thought processes toward women and sex.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!

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