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What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 32
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? Mountain Center, CA
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (currently pursuing)
What’s your occupation? Outdoor Recreation & Sustainability Coordinator/Grad student
What’s your current relationship status? Dating casually
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Somewhat
What’s your sexual orientation? Gay/lesbian
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 120+
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

Hollywood Hook-up in the Mountains

How long ago did this hookup happen? Four years ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Single

How would you best classify this hookup? Short fling

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was about 6′ with a faux-hawk cut. He had a little extra around the midsection but a nice smile and eyes that danced. He was at a retreat at the ranch where I worked and ended up on my trail ride. We talked some before the ride. He didn’t follow directions and got thrown from his horse so I had to (shucks) check in with him afterwards, too.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? After the trail ride I offered to take him and anyone else that wanted to go on a hike a couple days later. He gave me his business card which I googled later. He was a B-class Hollywood producer – how very SoCal (I’m from Virginia originally). He was the only one that showed up for the hike and I’m pretty sure he made sure to tell as few people as possible about the hike option. The hike took us up into the San Jacinto Mountains through some old gold mining territory. There was some flirting, but nothing physical until I took him into an old gold mine.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? It was fairly dark in the gold mine so it wasn’t difficult to pretend like I was accidentally bumping into him. One of those bumps turned into kissing, then he went down and sucked my dick for a little. We continued on with the hike and ended up sunbathing on some rocks away from the trail. We sucked each other off. He offered to fuck me, but I’m a top and wasn’t feeling it. He had come prepared with condoms and lube just in case it had worked out. I was kinda impressed.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We tried to meet up again before he left, but the timing didn’t work out. We did have an intermittent fling that lasted a few months. He came up to the ranch once or twice but usually I would find a way down to Los Angeles or meet him at an event in Palm Springs. I cut it off after a while because I was in it just for the fun – which I’d told him explicitly multiple times – and he kept acting more and more like it was a dating situation. The kicker had been when I visited him and every friend I met of his knew who I was before meeting me. I got home that weekend to find that his Facebook status had been just my name the entire weekend. If I was looking for a boyfriend at the time, it would’ve been cute, but I wasn’t and we lived two very different lives – geographically, financially, and materialistically. I’ve met up with him one or two times since it ended but nothing sexual has happened despite him wanting to. I appreciate that we can still talk on Facebook and genuinely be interested in the well-being of each other.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) No penetrative sex happened

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), I was feeling lonely, Making new friends, It was easy / convenient

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I’ve told a number of friends. I had nine housemates/co-workers at the time. They all found out. Anyone that wanted to hear the story got to. We all played wingman for each other whenever possible because we lived in the mountains so we didn’t get many opportunities to hook-up, so when someone had a chance we all pitched in to try to make it work.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Outdoor hook-ups are always hot. It was cool seeing the fancy side of LA/Hollywood/Palm Springs/Burbank. I had the most expensive meal of my life with him ($98 for two – I made him let me pay my half).

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? I would’ve enjoyed continuing on with it, but clearly he was more emotionally invested in it than I was so I didn’t want to mislead him.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Not particularly. The circumstances are what set this one apart from many of the other hook-ups I’ve had.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? He did get free tickets for me and two of my housemates to one of his shows in Palm Springs – third row, center. We were on the VIP list and everything. It made us feel pretty swanky. Major bonus points to him for inviting not just me, but my friends, too, and actually wanting to be friends with them as well.

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I have learned a lot about myself and my sexuality through casual sex. It was through casual sex that I found I like to be a bit dominant in bed (or wherever it happens). It’s also how I found I’m into stuff like biting and exhibitionism. It gives me confidence for future sexual encounters to know what I’m good at relative to other guys and being aware of what they will find enjoyable. Being able to be open about casual sexual encounters allows for friends to share their stories more easily and provides some amazing sex education without trying to make it a formal classroom effort.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? This seems like a pretty cool idea. I hope it is a great resource for both readers and contributors.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!

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