What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 20
What’s your race/ethnicity? Black
What continent do you live on? Africa
What country and/or city do you live in? Johannesburg
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Student
What’s your current relationship status? In a serious relationship (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Somewhat
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 15-18
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
How long ago did this hookup happen? 5months ago
What was your relationship status at the time? In a relationship (monogamous)
How would you best classify this hookup? Fuck-buddies / Booty call
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For 1 to 3 years
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He is very tall, thin and dark. We went on a few dates after being introduced by a mutual friend, but unfortunately we didn’t work out at the time and ended up being friends. There wasn’t any connection when we first met…probably because I wasn’t even interested in seeing him.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We lost touch for about a year and met again at a lunch. I was invited by my boyfriend who turned out to be his very good friend. He was angry at me for dating his friend — arguing that he had been the first person to show interest, but he made it clear that he wasn’t going to stop until we hooked up. So every time I saw him or talked he made sure the conversations would be sexual.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? The sex was kinky!! We ended up cancelling evening plans so we could be with each other all night. The guy is into hardcore sex with a lot of bondage involved, so having such an experience for the first time was mind blowing. It made me feel like a slut but for some reason, but I liked every bit of it.
And yes, he was a good lover, and we talked about more sex and what we wanted to do to each other in the next encounter.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I went back to my place and I thought I’d feel guilty and not want anything to do with him anymore, but I kept thinking about him and lowkey hoped we would keep seeing each other. I think I like him or its lust… I don’t even know.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Plan B / Emergency contraception
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness
How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I havent talked to anyone about it yet and I dont plan on doing so
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I got to have better sex than I was getting and it boosted my confidence aswell as my skills in bed
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? It made me realise I didnt want to be with my boyfriend anymore yet he had done nothing wrong and I was the one sleeping with his friend
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Yes yes yes!! It has changed the way I see everything mainly because my self esteem is at a level I never imagined it would be
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative
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