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What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 18
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? UK
Highest education received: High school diploma
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 2
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

My First Hookup

How long ago did this hookup happen? Yesterday

What was your relationship status at the time? Single

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I met him online, and we met up in person once, a few days before the hook-up. Having met him on an infamous “dating” app, I was confident he was only really in it for sex, and as I myself had just gotten out of an unhappy long-term relationship, I was up for it. I found him very, very attractive, and very flirty, thus enhancing the appeal.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? There was no specific planning of sexual intercourse involved, however, he invited me over pretty much immediately after we first met in person, and it was implied that there would be intercourse of some kind if I wanted it. He instigated it almost entirely, I was just going along with it for the fun. We were both attracted to each other, so I guess I figured it’d be a fun experience.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? He made a move approximately ten minutes after I got to his apartment. He started off with just kissing and touching but very quickly progressed to intercourse. It didn’t take long before he pulled out a pair of handcuffs, either. He went down and spent a pretty decent amount of time doing so, which really surprised me. We ended up having sex twice within the space of four hours. He was very dominating the first time around, which I loved, and even when he asked me to dominate him the second time, it was clear, he still liked to have some control. He threw me around a lot, told me what to do, pinned me down, spanked me, and yes, I even let him handcuff me.

He seemed a little bit nervous and very focused, but I myself was trying to make it as casual and fun as possible. It was a very weird experience to me – before this encounter, I’d only ever had sex with one person, who I’d been in a long-term relationship with, and so to have such a casual, light-hearted experience actually felt really good.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? After the hookup, we chatted for a little bit, then I went home. Now it’s the day after, and we haven’t spoken, and I don’t really know what that means. I do know that it doesn’t bother me – I have no interest in him romantically. I do feel as if I could hook up with him again though, and after our last encounter, I get the impression he’d be up for that too.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Thought it was an important experience to have, To feel better about myself, To feel more desirable, To feel more confident, Submission / Relinquishing power, Making new friends, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it, It was easy / convenient

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I spoke to a few of my friends about it, and they found the story rather amusing.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? The best thing about this hookup was actually what it taught me about myself. Having dealt with a lot of body image issues for the majority of my teenage years, it was a nice feeling to know that I was naked in front of somebody close to a stranger, and it didn’t bother me. I didn’t feel uncomfortable, or unattractive, and he definitely appreciated my body, and so it really just taught me a lot about myself and how I’ve overcome a lot of the issues I thought I’d be stuck with forever.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? He couldn’t kiss for love nor money. He was brilliant at everything else, but his kissing just wasn’t overly great, and that made the experience a bit more challenging.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I’ve realised from this hookup that sex doesn’t always have to be serious and romantic; it can be fun, and light-hearted, and totally enjoyable. Also, as I’ve already said, it’s made me realise that I can be sexy, and I can get naked and have sex with people without having to worry about my body image issues. It’s also made me realise that I do really enjoy sex. Sexual intercourse with my ex-boyfriend was always uncomfortable, and I thought that maybe I just wasn’t into sex, but now I’ve had experience with somebody else, I’ve realised that my ex and I just didn’t match physically, and that I can really enjoy sex.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I feel like casual sex is very underrated. I found it very satisfying, being able to have sex with literally no obligation to sleep beside them, or to text them the next morning. Sex and sexuality should be explored – so long as it’s safe and consensual, I think casual sex is an incredible thing.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!

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