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What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 50
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? Housewife
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 30ish
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

School Ties

How long ago did this hookup happen? Decades

What was your relationship status at the time? In a relationship (monogamous)

How would you best classify this hookup? Friends-with-benefits

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For 1 to 3 years

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I had many boyfriends and partners in college. There were some weeks when I needed a diary and a scorecard. I met J through mutual friends at school freshman year and though we went to a commuter school of tens of thousands, we managed to run into each other on campus, grab lunch several times a week, and kept our mutual attraction for each other going platonically, even though he was still seeing his long time, high school sweetheart L, and I was always in a relationship of some sort.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? By sophomore year, I had been going out exclusively with K — the most handsome, sexy, gorgeous guy on campus–bar none. K was the absolute love of my life and my complete obliterating obsession (more on him another time) when the relationship began to falter after the first six months of what had been an all-consuming, passionate and very intense love affair. I was really panicky. K was losing that loving feeling for me, his eyes wandered, he called less, he didn’t want to see me that Saturday night when he’d been invited to a party– said he wanted to go alone. I was devastated and this incident became part of the many ups and downs of our devolving relationship. So, J and I shared many intimacies of our relationship woes over all those cafeteria lunches on Tuesdays and Thursday’s when our schedules aligned. We just had this easy way of talking to each other. J was the youngest of 8 siblings and he was the only boy in the family. Of course, the handsome guy with the soulful, huge brown eyes, perfect smile, and adorable dimpled chin, knew how to talk to women–he grew up with 7 sisters. We just really adored each other and would even walk the entire length of campus holding hands and spilling our guts out to each other. We always shared sexual stories, our relationship ups/downs, all while the tension between us quietly simmered because we were both such lusty, hormonal kids. So after spilling the news that K didn’t want to see me Saturday night and what a huge blow that was, I walked and talked J all the way to his car parked in the last row of the enormous campus parking lot, then we sat in his car for 30 minutes and talked some more –and suddenly without much thought, but overwhelmed with grief, anger, sadness and frustration over K–I reached over, pulled the lever on J’s seat and flattened him out so he was completely reclined–and said, I want to suck your cock right now! He was happily bewildered, rock hard in a second, and I pulled his lovely cut cock out of his Levis jeans.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? J was, and remains, a man a great distinction in my memory. He had your average guy’s cock size (kids, with very few exceptions, they are ALL 6″ maybe 6 1/2″ long, and I’ve had a lot of cocks in my mouth), but the thing that was special about J is that he got the hardest of anyone I’ve ever known. It was so weird, it was like ever fiber and nerve ending in his penis was just flushed with raging super engorgement. So Hard! Like cement! (He later told me every girl he’s ever been with said that exact same thing). Anyway, I sucked him off like both our lives depended on it, he came in about 45 seconds, I swallowed, and blew both of our minds with that surprise parking lot blowjob. Our relationship became a secret sexual one after that.

On that Saturday night that K didn’t want to see me, J came over to my house, we did vodka shots in my bedroom, I blew him again, we left, went out for a bite to eat, then had sex for the very first time in his girlfriend L’s house on the living room floor in the dark. L and her parents were on vacation, and J was in charge of taking in their mail, feeding the cats, walking the dog, etc. Nothing was more satisfying, and more of a “fuck you” to both of our ungrateful, uncaring partners, who took us both for granted, than fucking each other hard and fast like wild animals doggy styles in his girlfriend’s house. We were so bad! I loved kissing J–such a good kisser–we had such chemistry. I remember how he filled me with that cement hard cock and came rather quickly cause he was so excited. I was on the pill, so after he exploded inside me, I felt so giddy. Like I’d won a big prize. I remember dancing around every room in that house, completely naked, and touching every piece of furniture in miss fancy pants’ rich girl house. Omg. I was really out of my mind, but it felt so good to be so bad. See what happens when you don’t take me to parties K? Fuck You. I’m fucking someone else.

J and I continued our amazing friendship, remained close, and ended up having some really adventuress sexcapades with each other (more on those another time) all while I still pined away for K and he still pined away for L.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? No, not even close

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? Loved it. Made me smile from ear to ear. Loved having this secret sexual dalliance with J. And we were both so good at hiding it, even after we started going on double dates with K and L. No one ever suspected.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Birth control pill / patch / ring / injection / implant

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, Thought it was an important experience to have, To feel better about myself, To feel more desirable, To cheer myself up, I was feeling lonely, Power / Dominance, Revenge / Getting even

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My best friend. We would tell each other everything. All the details!

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Crossing the line with someone I was emotionally connected to and knew so well after tamping down nearly two years of sexual tension and attraction.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? That I was still so sexually inexperienced–I was all bravado and take charge attitude –but I’d never once had an orgasm. I just didn’t know my body, I didn’t know how to masturbate, I didn’t know anything really. I was an expert at getting guys off, but I was completely clueless about my own anatomy and wouldn’t have my first orgasm till I used a vibrator sometime much later.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I was definitely moving in the direction of being more free and giving up on traditional relationships.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Love it. Obsessed with it.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!

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