What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 23
What’s your race/ethnicity? Hispanic / Latino/a
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? USA
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? Administrative Assistant
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? demisexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 5
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 1
The Last Time
How long ago did this hookup happen? halloween 2015
What was your relationship status at the time? unintentionally monogamous fwb
How would you best classify this hookup? Friends-with-benefits
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than 6 months
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was tan, with an undercut haircut of thick black hair, groomed facial hair, and nice eyebrows. I found him extremely attractive/was extremely attracted to him. He was dressed as a construction worker for halloween, which was great because for whatever reason I’ve always been turned on by guys in Tims. We’d met on an app a few months before and had been hanging out/hooking up consistently during that time. In September I found out he was moving to another city and also that he was batshit insane, but it was too late, I’d already fallen for him so instead of cutting him off I kept trying to spend time with him.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We went out with his friends for halloween. I wasn’t having a great time because it was a shitty club with a bunch of shitfaced white people stumbling about/dancing. Plus this girl who looked like she was 16 was trying to hit on my guy the entire time. I knew she didn’t have a chance, but it was annoying nonetheless. We barely touched in the club, it seemed like we were kind of avoiding each other because he was only in town for the weekend after having just moved away. When we got back to his friend’s place, though, we realized we were gonna sleep on the couch together. We were finally alone in the living room, and I was already turned on because he’d been secretively stroking my back and squeezing my ass when his friends were still in the room. We laid down together on the couch facing each other and knew exactly what would happen.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? As with all of our hookups, we were all over each other and he was a little rough with me which I loved. He and I had the most intense physical chemistry I’ve ever experienced. Being with him was always a whirlwind of pleasure where we intuitively knew what the other person wanted.
He got me naked, flipped me onto my stomach, and climbed on top of me so he could bite my back a bunch. It’s my favorite and he really enjoyed biting me too. He always bit really hard and left epic bruises on me. Seeing the marks freaked him out which turned me on more. At some point we started 69ing and I don’t know what it was, but he brought me to orgasm on his tongue probably in under a minute… if it weren’t for his dick in my mouth I would’ve screamed loud enough to wake his friends. I was shocked at how quickly I came and how strong the orgasm was . . . he knew exactly what to do to me. I climbed off him and got in between his legs and took his cock into my mouth. He loved my blowjobs because I licked him like a lollipop and was able to swirl my tongue around his head quickly. He was very vocal and I loved hearing him moan and grunt. He came quickly too, and we fell asleep naked and entangled on the pull-out couch in his friend’s living room.
As was expected of our chemistry, we were grinding on each other/making out/hooking up at various points throughout the night. But the one I remember distinctly was when he made me want a hard cock inside me more than I have ever wanted in my entire life to this day (I hadn’t had penetrative sex at the time we were hooking up). He kissed his way down my body to my pussy to lick me just the way I liked, and then sat up and spread my legs over his folded ones so that his rock hard cock could reach my dripping pussy.
The way he rubbed himself on my lips absolutely blew my mind. I was totally losing it and kept thinking about letting him fuck me. I still wonder to this day what he would’ve felt like inside me. But he kept teasing and teasing me, rubbing his cock up and down my pussy from my clit to my slit suuuuper slowly and deliciously. I was afraid of it accidentally slipping inside me because I was so wet, so I changed the angle of my hips and added my hand to guide his cock as it drove me completely insane. It felt like forever he was teasing me like that, and it was getting harder and harder to keep in my moans and to not ask him to fuck me. He must have seen how close I was to asking him that, because he then shoved two fingers firmly in my tight pussy, making my back arch off the couch as I came.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We fell asleep in each other’s arms. The next day, we ate breakfast with his friends before I had to leave for work. As we said goodbye, he told me he’d see me in a couple weeks when I went to visit my brother in the city this guy was now also moving to. I believed him. But that was the last time I ever saw him. There were lots of emotional conversations both before and after he left… he kind of broke my heart.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) No penetrative sex happened
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, Hoping or expecting it would lead to something more, Power / Dominance, Submission / Relinquishing power, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? A little tipsy/high
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? No one knows about that specific one. They’d probably say it was stupid of me to hook up with him when I already knew how batshit insane (emotionally immature, narcissistic, etc etc) he was.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Very
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Do you regret this hookup? Somewhat
Why do you regret this hookup? I wish I’d never met him. He was amazing to me for 6 months and then disappeared. It was a nightmare.
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Safest and most intense chemistry I’ve ever experienced in a hookup
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? I hope I never meet anyone like him ever again.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Gave me extreme trust issues, made me feel like I could only ever be used for sex, made me feel like I’d made up our entire relationship in my head.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Very negative
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I generally hate the assumption that women are the ones to “catch feelings.” I also hate the phrase “catch feelings” in general. It’s not a disease and everybody’s just a bunch of cowards. Hook up with whoever and if you feel something that’s fine but say it and don’t expect anything. Just don’t run from fun times out of fear of emotion.
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