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What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 40
What’s your race/ethnicity? Black
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? Atlanta
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? I work
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Somewhat
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? No
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? Several
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? My 1st

6 Years Too Long!!!

How long ago did this hookup happen? Almost 6 years ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Single

How would you best classify this hookup? Friends-with-benefits

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a month

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was tall, dark, and moderately handsome. We met a month before “hooking up”, I met him at a bar watching football. He stared me down and I kept walking. He finally approached me and said, “it was meant for us to meet”. He stated he had seen me the night before out with my friends…it was true even though I didn’t notice him.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We had been on a dinner date and he went to the gym with me. About 2 weeks later I invited him over for dinner and it happened.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? Normal regular sex the first time. He spent the night.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? Happy ????. Now not so much, it never turned into a relationship, but that was what I wanted.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None, Condoms, IUD (Intrauterine device)

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, Hoping or expecting it would lead to something more, To feel better about myself, To cheer myself up, I was feeling lonely, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it, It was easy / convenient

How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it

What substances did you consume? Alcohol

How intoxicated was your partner? A little tipsy/high

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My friend

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Very

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Do you regret this hookup? Very much

Why do you regret this hookup? Waste of time

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Learning more about putting my wants first

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Pregnancy/ abortion

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Yes absolutely

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Somewhat negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? Don’t expect someone who states they don’t want a relationship to change

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? It is not safe

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Not familiar

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!