by Anne

Gender: Female
Age: 21
Race/ethnicity: Asian
Location: South East Asia
Highest education received: Some college (not currently in college)
Occupation: Personal Assistant
Relationship status: Single
Religious affiliation: Roman Catholic
How religious are you? Somewhat
Sexual orientation: Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 1
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

Bloody Black Saturday by Tinder

How long ago did this hookup happen? 2 months

How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? Not really sure maybe a one-night stand

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He’s not the guy I imagined that gonna pop my cherry. Fair-skinned. Curly hair. Medium build. Taller than me, I think he’s around 5’5 – 5’7. We’re both of the same age. Not the “model-gorgeous type” but not bad looking either. We never met before the day of the “hook-up. He’s one of my match on the so called dating app Tinder. He’s different from the guys I’ve talked to in the app and maybe that’s the reason why I considered the idea of having sex with him. He’s not the first guy to initiate on having a casual relationship with. I’ve lost count actually but he’s the first and the only guy I actually said yes.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? It was a long planning actually. I lived with my strict parents so I can do it immediately with him. We didn’t do phone sex, we’re just sexting. If I am not mistaken we waited for 11 days to meet and do it. We started talking around Tuesday and he wanted to meet by Saturday that week. I told him to wait until Saturday next week (Black Saturday, hence the title), for me to plan what am I gonna tell my parents and to prepare myself also.  
We have constant communication – Tinder, texts, calls, and Facebook. We talked about sex primarily, I told him I was a virgin and I felt that’s the reason why he want to sleep with me. Guys and their ego. That 11 days have been the longest foreplay ever.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? Even before we met I specifically told him that I don’t want to do other stuff aside from oral and vaginal because it’s my first time. We started a bit slow. We went to the room. We kissed and because I came from work and a long ride, I told him I need to shower first. He join me in the shower and we had oral sex there. It was interrupted because I need to take a “real shower” so he wait outside. 
When I’m done, I join him outside. We went to bed. Kissed each other and he taught me the basics. He went down on me and it’s kinda hot. I love it. Then he entered me, missionary position. It hurts and I bled. I never thought that I’ll bleed, too much internet reading and cosmo reading. lol. He felt that I’m a bit uncomfortable, he switched from missionary to doggie style. He told me, and I’m not sure if it’s true, that it doesn’t hurt a lot when you do it that way. I didn’t  have an orgasm but he did. I’m not letting myself go and I think that the reason why I didn’t achieved it. 

I cleaned myself and went back in the bed with him. We talked but mostly he’s the one who do the talking. He’s pretty confident guy. Not the kind of guy who beat around the bush, straightforward. If you don’t guard your heart, you’ll fall with a snap of a hand. We ate and watched TV.
We did 2 or 3 rounds that evening. 2nd me on top but we didn’t finish because I really don’t know what am I doing. Remembering it makes me laugh. 3rd, he stand up and half of my body was in bed, he hold my legs and started humping. Like a wheelbarrow position but I was lying in bed so it’s not hard for me. The hottest part of it is the sound of the humping. It’s so loud and dirty! 
We lay down again, talked and cuddled. He have a thing in cuddling which I was planning not to do because of my friend’s advice. But we did it anyway. He told me earlier he’s tired and he really fell asleep like a dead man. Which kinda disappoint me because I was really expecting whole night. But there he is sleeping like a baby. The only consolation is that he didn’t fake it. I didn’t fall asleep immediately maybe after an hour that’s the only time i slept. I woke up around 2 am and check my phone. My friend texted me to ask if I’m fine. We exchanged text message for almost an hour then I decided to go back to sleep. 
I woke up earlier than him. We ate breakfast. Give him head one last time and he cum in my mouth. That’s it. We get dressed, we kissed and hugged then leave the room together.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? We never talked about STI. I don’t have the guts to ask him about that, which now I know is so wrong. He knows that I’m clean because I’m a virgin. We didn’t use any condom and I don’t even know if I’m safe that night because my period was so late. So we opted to do the “plan-B”.

What were your REASONS for having this hookup? My primary reason is CURIOSITY. I’m 21, single and still a virgin. Almost all of my friends done it before so I can’t stop thinking why the hell I still haven’t done it. Yeah, so immature and so insecure.

Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? No, none at all.

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We part ways. I went south, he went north. The texts and calls stop. The only communication we have is Facebook. He contacted me after 3 days to remind me about the “plan-b” which I already took without his reminder because I don’t want to get pregnant. 
Once a month he message me on Facebook to check if I am available. I don’t say no and I don’t say yes either. Part of me want to do the sex part again but another part of me feel so dirty doing it again. 
I know we can never have a serious relationship. I’ll be a hypocrite if I say I understand that. Maybe the fact that he’s my first made me feel something for him. I know in myself that I don’t love him but I can stop myself to feel something. Maybe an attachment?

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? One of my friend. She already know that I’ll do it with this guy, I asked for her opinion on what am I going to do. She was shock because my views before about sex is “sex if you’re really serious with each other” and not the “no-strings attached kind of thing”. She still supported me and I never heard any bad feedback from her.

Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? It is consensual. We talked about it and we agreed mutually.

Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? I don’t know. That’s the question I’ve been asking myself for almost 2 months. There are times I regret it. Specially the times he acting like a jerk towards me. There are times that I don’t.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Best thing? The sex, definitely. No doubt about that. The worst maybe the guilt afterwards. This experience definitely change my views about everything, sex, love and even in life. Some are good. Some are bad. The hopeless romantic in me died because of this hook-up. I just felt that because this guy got me so easily, the next guy I’ll fall in love with will think of me as a slut. The other thing I learned is I can do casual sex. Without the guilt and the dirty feeling, I enjoyed it. It’s good because there’s no complication, no serious commitment,  just pure unadulterated sex.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Somewhat positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Somewhat negative

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