This post is sponsored by The T Bar.
What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 21
What’s your race/ethnicity? East Asian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? USA, NY
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your current relationship status? Dating casually
Religious affiliation: Agnostic
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 4
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
How long ago did this hookup happen? 1 week ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status
How would you best classify this hookup? Friends-with-benefits
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I usually meet my partners on dating apps, but my personal favorite has been Bumble because I like being in control. Coffee Meets Bagel is also good because it allows me to better filter my matches, but I deleted it after I found it boring. Swiping is fun.
I generally look for taller, older (22-26) men. Don’t really care about their ethnicity as long as I feel like there is some sexual tension between us. I also prefer it if we could carry a conversation. I don’t want to sleep with someone that I can’t connect with.
This was the first guy I ever hooked up with, and I thought that he was way out of my league (was a football player and everything).
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? Hookup began in the car, but we started making out when we went to the movies together. He instigated it, and I was surprised that he was into me, but I wanted something new and went along with it. We didn’t expect to hookup, but before I knew it, we were in the backseat of his car.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We started to make out and then he told me to take off my panties. After that, he fingered me and brought me onto his lap. There he moved the seat down and we moved to the backseat, where he went down on me. It was in the middle of the night so it wasn’t like we could easily be seen, but oftentimes he would pause and sit up, while fingering me and look out the window to see if there was anyone near.
He was nice, and the fingering was okay, but I haven’t had sex often so it hurt a little. I told him about it after and he said that I should have told him that it hurt so that he would go more gentle on me.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat
Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I like cuddling after intimacy, and he was open to cuddling and talking. We talked about our work, hooking up, and the dangers of hooking up. We didn’t have sex because he didn’t have a condom, and I would never have sex with anyone without protection. He appreciated it, but he also told me to be careful.
I felt a bit weird about it the next day because he was 26, and in my first hookup, i chose the backseat of a car. I started out pretty kinky.
We are still talking, but he has a very busy work schedule, and lives pretty far so it may be difficult to meet up. However, he is sometimes willing to drive over to meet with me. He’s a good guy– Christian, friendly, and thoughtful. If I wasn’t so emotionally scarred from my previous relationship, I’d be open to thinking about going out with him. Then again, not sure how interested 26 year olds are with 21 year old undergrads.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms, Discussed STI testing history, No penetrative sex happened
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Thought it was an important experience to have, To feel better about myself, To feel more desirable, To feel more confident, I was feeling lonely, Making new friends, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? A little tipsy/high
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but didn’t give a ‘no’
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I talked to some friends about it, and they were all worried. They told me that I should still get tested for oral STIs, but normally those don’t really appear until after a while. Now they all don’t share food/drinks with me.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively negative
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I thought it was a fun experience to give a guy a blowjob and get fingered in the backseat of a car. Pleasure without emotional attachment is pretty awesome.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Couldn’t have sex!
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? It made me want it more, actually.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
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