What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 29
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? USA
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? Professor
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 14
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
How long ago did this hookup happen? 1 year
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? Short fling
How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was from my hometown, but younger – about 22. We met at a bar after a big group party downtown. I thought he was cute and funny. I didn’t know anything about him except his name, and that I went to school with some of his siblings.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We were “touchy” at the bar – hand on the lower back, rubbing the forearm, etc. we went outside to a private place and started making out.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We started walking back to where I was staying, but we were so handsy and kissing that it was hard to walk at the same time. Fortunately, we were near a graveyard, so I suggested we go there and fool around. I had condoms with me, so I wasn’t concerned about unprotected sex. I sucked on him until he was hard, then he entered me vaginally with the missionary style. The ground was hurting my back when he thrust, so I flipped over and he fucked me from behind, still vaginally. Our clothes were half on (I was in a dress) and I enjoyed the sex tremendously, but I was started to feel sick (I hadn’t eaten enough so my blood sugar was low). So we stopped before either of us came. He wanted to meet up the next day, but I was leaving, so I just said thanks and goodbye and we parted each walked to the separate places we were staying.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat
Did you have an orgasm? No, not even close
Did your partner have an orgasm? No
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I felt great! I was glad we didn’t get caught, and I had a slight hangover, but I didn’t regret it. I knew that I had had sex because I was really craving the physical attention – I wasn’t looking for a boyfriend, just someone with a penis to help me out. And even though I didn’t orgasm, I still enjoyed it. I saw him recently from afar and my only thought was, “Oh yeah, that’s the guy I fucked in a cemetery.” I have no emotional attachment to him.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Intoxication, To feel better about myself, To feel more desirable, To feel more confident, To cheer myself up, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My best friend who I was staying with. She thought it was a crazy story, but was glad I had fun and was safe.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Mixed (Some positive, some negative)
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? The feeling that someone wanted to have primal, consensual sex with me, and it felt great to be outside in the open – it added an extra thrill factor.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? That I started to feel ill and decided to stop.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Only that it’s easier to have immediate, casual sex than I was led to believe.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? We didn’t fuck directly on a grave site; it was in the service road that winds through the middle.
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I think the desire to want casual sex should be considered by society just as valid and worthwhile as monogamous, exclusive sex.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Seems intriguing!
You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!