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What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 49
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? IT professional
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

Convention blow job in Orlando

How long ago did this hookup happen? 3-4 months

What was your relationship status at the time? Engaged/Married (monogamous)

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? She was around 5’4 dark hair and brown eyes. Average build. She said her name was Abbie from Georgia. She approached my husband while he was sitting on a bench outside his hotel.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I was told that she came in to him right away. He had been drinking and he could smell the alcohol on her as well. He told her he was married and that she was dangerous and was going to go back to his hotel room. She followed him to the elevator and jumped in. She then proceeded to grab him sexually. He pushed her hands away at first then they got off the elevator and went to his room.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? I was told that she pushed her way into the room and then sat on the bed unzipped his pants and have him a blowjob. After that he went to the bathroom and thought “what the fuck have I just done”! He stayed in the bathroom for awhile and when he came out she was in one of the beds past out or asleep. They never undressed from what he says. He said it was quick and awkward. He didn’t wake her up and not another word was spoken. We usually talk when we are apart so I was stressed and worried that something had happened to him. My oldest son and I finally tracked him down to what hotel he was staying in and I got him on the phone. I knew right away that something was not right. I got him to admit that there was another women in his room. It was the worst night of my life! I have never felt so broken and betrayed. This is the love of my life and has been with me for over 28 years! I can’t even describe the pain and hurt that I went through that night and still go through. I went away for a few days and contemplated suicide. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone not even the whore who did this.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Not at all

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one

Did your partner have an orgasm? No

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? After this happened and I talked to my husband that night, he left the room and didn’t return until she was gone. As far as I know after the blow job there were no other words said to each other or any interaction. This is what I’ve been told. We are a broken family now. The pain that this has caused is deep and painful. I feel my pain as well as the pain that my husband is dealing with. We love each other and we are doing all we can to put us back together. I wish I could talk to this woman and let her know how their actions that night has destroyed our family.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None, No penetrative sex happened

What were your motives for this hookup? Intoxication, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it

How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did you consume? Alcohol

How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? I’m not sure / I don’t know

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? We have had many talks about this and our life is a roller coaster now. This casual sex has destroyed all of us.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Other

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Very

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Do you regret this hookup? Very much

Why do you regret this hookup? My husband tells me all the time that he wishes he could go back and change what happened.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Nothing good comes from betraying those you love and trust.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? My family is broken.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? We both agree that we will never drink without the other person present and that we will be more committed to each other and aware of the dangers around us.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Not at all positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Very negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? I felt like my husband threw me away that night for some whore and a blowjob. It has been 3-4 months and we are still suffering and dealing with the consequences of that night.

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? This experience has changed our lives. I will never be the same. If you are married and don’t have an open marriage then love your spouse and give them the attention and love that you both need. If you want casual sex, leave your spouse first. The hurt and betrayal is the worst thing I have ever been through. I hope we can put us back together again.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!