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What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 43
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? United States
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Always the good girl
How long ago did this hookup happen? 7 years ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? friends with benefits to falling in love
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For more than 3 years
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? This is a man I’ve known my whole life. Our Families have been friends since the dawn of time. I’ve had an undeniable crush on him most of my life. His business requires hard manual labor so he was beautifully defined. He was rock hard, broad shoulders, little waist and a delectable tight ass! The sight of him made me pant!
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? It began with an open discussion about a sexual advance of someone I knew who asked me to be in a threesome with himself and his long time girl. One thing led to another and the conversation became a lot more personal then either of us intended. We discussed his marriage and I knew much before but far from the whole story. I knew from their history when discussing things he was one foot out the door. I had just had some life changing events happen. I was shocked when I felt mutual about the friends with benefits idea but knew in the back of my mind I had such a draw to him my entire adult life I couldn’t deny it from myself or him any longer. We were like magnets!
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? Initially I chickened out. So I got to see the crown jewel (and it was magnificent. ) We dry humped, made out, he kissed my breasts, and then he ate me out! We talked constantly so within days he was back to see me at my place because it was the most convenient. I sucked his big cock while he licked me in the nether region. He inserted at first one finger and moaned because of how wet and ready I was for more of him. We kept kissing while he put a second finger inside me. He wanted to be sure he wasn’t hurting me. I kissed him harder and begged him to thrust deeper inside my hot, moist cavern. He complied and put a third finger inside me. I pushed his head down toward my freshly shaven crotch. He smiled and threw me on my back while he had his way with my lips until I begged him to get inside of me! He chuckled while I begged and he smiled as he made me beg breathlessly. He was so gentle when he finally took me. He thrust deep and true! We both groaned. I was SO excited to be having sex with him. I directed him as to what I wanted and liked. He knew full well what I wanted from him. My style was new to him and I excited him in ways he had no idea it was possible. Before we knew it we we’re fucking daily. I do mean daily! Every chance we had he had his fingers or cock inside me or I had my mouth around his cock! We were doing it three to six times a day….everywhere! No place was off limits! Cars, fields, chairs, standing, kneeling, four-wheeler, kitchen table, bed, couch, living room floor, road sides, church yard, hotel rooms. We would meet on a road and while we talked he would finger me. After sucking off my sweetness he would have me follow him and we fucked intensely! He’s taken me doggy style in the middle of a field, and in numerous out buildings. For years my favorite thing to do was undo his pants while he was on the phone and start sucking him off and watch his face and listen to his controlled voice. Afterwards he’d fuck me hard or make love to me soft and tenderly. He is a kind and thoughtful lover. I have this fetish for his ass. I love to pat it, spank it and even bite it. I told him I loved him. He fought it but soon admitted he had the same feelings for me. Yes the L word was exchanged. Now it’s on a regular basis. I’m afraid I’m going to be hurt but I cannot get enough of him!
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I couldn’t get enough of him and it’s more than sex.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Sterilization
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, Hoping or expecting it would lead to something more
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I confided in my Grandmother. She wasn’t thrilled about the whole thing but understood how it happened. She believed he had one foot out the door also. She emotionally supported me as best as she could.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Mixed (Some positive, some negative)
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Somewhat
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Somewhat
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? He is my best friend and supporter, as I for him. We always have great sex and I want forever with this man if he’ll just jump ship.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? He unfortunately isn’t divorced. Every dead line I set I break. I’m in love with a man I may never be able to have. Because of this I get very emotional and sometimes angry. I don’t want to share him anymore.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? This is the first time I’ve done anything like this. I would never get involved with a married man again ever.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I can’t do it. People tend to get hurt in these things. What could start well intentioned usually doesn’t go as planned.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? It’s a great way to talk about things you cannot breathe to another living soul.
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