What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 28
What’s your race/ethnicity? Southeast Asian
What continent do you live on? Australia
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (currently pursuing)
What’s your current relationship status? Single
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 3
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 8
End of semester fling
How long ago did this hookup happen? Today
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than 6 months
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I met him at the start of this uni semester two months ago. He is in early 40s, but looked more in his late 30s though. He was white, fairly attractive with blue eyes and he was sitting behind the table where I was sitting in the sea of Indian/Pakistani students on his table. I had a physical attaction to him.
At the end of the first class day (there were two classes that week), there was a group activity where we had to come up with an answer to the question. We split into groups and I caught his attention and started chatting. Started with general ‘what you do for work’ etc. and then onto group activity. Next day I sat next to him and then last month at the last class, I sat next to him.
After class ended for the term and was his last class at the univeristy, we started chatting and exchanged Facebook. A week after class ended and I had a day off work, I bumped into him and we exchanged numbers and then it went from there. We met up earlier this month, the day before flying off to a family passing that week.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? Today was the second time of hanging out with him outside of class since the subject ended. I had excess leave from work that I needed to take and today was my day off work. We met at lunchtime over coffee in the city, then went downtime for lunch time and then went back to the same place for dessert. We talked out different things from uni, travels and then I brought up the subject of women and mentioned he dated a few women in his life. He asked about how many guys I’ve been with and mentioned that I’d only been with a few, mostly not long-term though.
He mentioned he’s not looking for a long term relationship due to him flying in and out of the country and interstate frequently and not many girls understanding his lifestyle (btw, he’s semi-retired but does freelancing consulting if that makes sense?). I also mentioned that I was after a a casual fling/arrangement thing too at this stage as I’m not in a mindset of committing myself to anything and wanting to take things as they come.
Then we decided to walk to the harbour park and things went on from there.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We sat down in a park, placed our stuff down and sat down. He laid down and then I sat watching the harbour and then next moment, he laid his arm out and then I laid down. He then cuddled me tightly in which I wasn’t used to and then he tried to kiss/make out with me but I mentioned that making out was a weird experience to me (I did it 5 years ago and still doesn’t click with me). Then I mentioned I ike being touched playfully and spanked and then he started touching/caressing my body.
I also noticed playfully that he was hard and he confirmed. Had it been in a private room it would be ok but since it was in public, we couldn’t do it. Then it was playful kisses and then touches around my butt and thighs and legs. He mentioned what he likes and I mentioned what I liked.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? It was 4 and I had to head home to get ready for work the next day. I left to take the bus home and maybe message him (maybe next month as I only have a few days off) or see what happens. While he’s here, he lives with his sister (who has kids) and I live at home so only the hotel is a consideration.
Would be nice to hookup with him again but we’ll see what happens. Would like to go all the way then if it happens.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Birth control pill / patch / ring / injection / implant, No penetrative sex happened
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Thought it was an important experience to have, To feel more desirable, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? No one
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone.
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Having to meet someone within a short time (2 months) after ending a casual arrangement due to job and living arrangement changes. Having casual fun and not being too serious at this stage of life.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? In a park and in public so couldn’t do the things we couldnt do and I wanted to do too.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Not really. I really like it, provided that both partners are on the same page and that I am upfront wit my experiences/restrictions. Being mindful with who I hookup with.
Still enjoying being single though!
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? Having to meet / hang with someone after ending a casual arrangement within 2 months was a suprise to me. Didn’t expect myself to meet someone sooner rather than later.
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? In my experience, the one’s that are upfront are the one’s that I’ve enjoyed hook-up /casual sex with.
5 years ago, I would be shy/scared to go for experiences like this but now, I enjoy it. Take it as it comes. Numbers don’t matter for me. Guess it depends on the mindset you’re in at that stage.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Keep at it.
You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!