What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 20
What’s your race/ethnicity? South Asian
What continent do you live on? Asia
What country and/or city do you live in? India
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Student
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 3
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? None
My First Casual Hook-Up
How long ago did this hookup happen? 3 months back
What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status
How would you best classify this hookup? Fuck-buddies / Booty call
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? So I had freshly gotten out of a relationship which lasted nearly three-and-a-half years. I decided to rebound as fast as possible to keep all the post-breakup emotions at bay. After four days of breaking up, I downloaded Tinder. I won’t lie I was pretty excited about using it because I hadn’t been single throughout my young adult and partly my adult life. Then I came across His profile.
Some five years back, I heard about this guy through a school senior who went into modeling, and He was her friend. I stalked him on Facebook and found him absolutely hot. He looked perfect. He had eyes which could pierce anything like a laser, a jawline which was so strong that it swooned me, perfect cheekbones and a killer smile. For five years, I stalked this guy and saw him achieving new feats in his life- he got into acting and acted in many popular shows too.
This guy was on Tinder and I had found him, I HAD to swipe him right. We matched and it turned out that he lived just 2 kilometers away from where I did. It was on.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I was a bit unsure of his real identity, I thought someone else might have made a fake profile of his to get laid because he was a popular TV show actor now, so I asked him to meet me just for an hour or two. We met and it went great. It was my first time hooking up with a stranger so I told him to meet me once again for drinks and that day we made out in his car when he dropped me at my residence. Then we decided to meet up again at his place soon.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? I reached his residence wearing the kinkiest lingerie I had with me. We decided to roll a joint and have some wine. We went to his washroom to smoke up and he played some music on his speakers to set the mood. He asked me if I wanted to hear a particular song, I asked him to play ‘Love Is A Bitch’ by Two Feet. After a while, he asked me how am I doing and held me and kissed me. Then we started making out to that song and it felt so good. He took off my pants, bent me over and penetrated me from behind while I was smoking the joint while sipping on the wine, too.
It felt magical, his penis was the appropriate size and girth, and he knew what he was doing, very well. He treated me with a lot of respect and made me as comfortable as possible. We then went to the bed and had sex on his bed. He was very dominating, he physically commanded me to change positions or go down on him and honestly, it felt very hot. His body, his skin, his face, everything about him was perfect. He is one of the most good-looking people I have come across in my life.
We actually talked in his bed for a while about a portable telescope he recently purchased online and later on we went up to his roof where he set up his telescope and showed me the moon. Finally, he dropped me back home and kissed me before I got out of his car.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? No, not even close
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I felt good about the hook-up. Mostly because it helped me get my mind off my breakup. It gave me a distraction, a new person to think about. Plus the sex was great. I expected us to become friends because he told me that he expected me to become his good friend as he thought we connected from our minds, but honestly, I acted a bit repulsive as I wasn’t sure if friendship should be mixed with casual sex.
After a while, when we planned to meet up again, he sometimes would go MIA or not come online on WhatsApp, making me wait for his reply. Then he would apologize for doing it and I went to his place once again, that time he got an orgasm. Then he ditched me once again after it, and I was done with him that time. His text is still on my phone and I haven’t replied to it, nor do I plan on doing it anytime soon.
But the experience was good, he showed me a great time throughout it all. I needed it.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None, Plan B / Emergency contraception
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Thought it was an important experience to have, To cheer myself up, I was feeling lonely, Everyone else was/is doing it, Boredom, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? A little tipsy/high
What substances did you consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish
How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I talked to three of my friends about him initially, who envied me a lot as he was quite popular and they saw him on TV, too. But in general, they were pretty excited for me.
I told two of my sisters who told me to stay safe.
I also told my ex about it, who said that he kissed a girl last week and he thought he was moving on too fast but now he feels better. He laughed and took it in a positive stride, overall.
I also recently told this to two of my recent Tinder hookups.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Mixed (Some positive, some negative)
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? The fact that I hooked up with a guy I crushed on for like five years who is fucking attractive. We went on two dates which were really fun too. I liked spending time with him too.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? That we couldn’t become friends and the way it just abruptly ended. I thought it deserved a better end.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Yes.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? I learned many things from this hookup. Firstly, one should never try to interpret what the other person’s actions mean. Whatever they are doing, the end motive is to get you in bed. Secondly, there needs to be some common ground where two people should meet to have a fun sexual encounter. I’m not saying that there needs to be compatibility, but there should be some comfort between the two. Thirdly, keep it short. Always. Twice is enough for casual sex. Maximum thrice.
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I think right now, casual sex is my thing because I would want the sexual satisfaction with minimum emotions involved. It has definitely hardened me up and I am liking the confidence it has given me, the confidence that I am, at the end of the day not dependent on a particular person for my happiness. I can choose to derive it from anyone and anytime I want. It has made me very practical and made me meet all these people and know them in a way not many people would get to know them.
The people around me are not very open about the concept of casual sex. My parents would kill me and then themselves if they got to know that I am first, sexually active before marriage and two, that too with multiple people. I would really appreciate if the society becomes more accepting towards the idea of casual sex.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I think the Casual Sex Project is a catalyst to normalizing the idea of casual sex in people’s minds. I think it is a great initiative and would like to a be a part of it as much as I can be!
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