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What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 18
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? London
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (currently pursuing)
What’s your occupation? NA
What’s your current relationship status? Dating casually
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? None
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 3
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

First Gay Experience

How long ago did this hookup happen? 3 years ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Single

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For 1 to 3 years

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I’d known Ben for 3 years, we were in secondary school together. We were both 15 at the time and I had no idea he was gay. He was short with blonde hair and kind of a dark brownish blue eyes.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We were having a sleep over at his mum’s house. We were split screening and playing xbox together for hours until about 2am when we both went to bed. We slept in the same bed but top and tailed. I’d never had guessed what happened next as Ben made his move as I slept.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? I must start by saying this, I had previously slept round Ben’s  before maybe 2 months prior and when I had woken up the next morning my balls kinda hurt and the base of my shaft was kind of sticky, at the time i thought it was weird but didn’t think any more into it. Now I know why.

It was early hours of the morning when I felt something on my balls, I was still half asleep so I think I just rolled over then back a little bit (being half asleep I didn’t put two and two together that it was his hand holding my balls). I’m not sure if I fell asleep again or not but what felt like immediately after I felt a hand slide up my shorts. It was Ben, he was now laying right next to me, his hand moved slowly up to the base of my shaft and he just held it.

I was frozen, I was unsure what to do, I didn’t wanna make things weird or awkward for the both of us so I laid there thinking, ok maybe he’ll stop now. As I was thinking all this Ben began to slowly tug at my penis. I could feel the blood flowing into my penis, I tried acting like I was close to waking up in hopes to scare Ben off but he didn’t budge now as he began wanking me slowly.

A million thoughts flew through my head, I had never even been with a girl yet and now my first sexual experience was going to be with a guy!

Again, I was too scared, too worried to just say something. Ben pulled his hand from my shorts, I was so relieved as I thought it was over. Just as I was about to roll over I felt his fingers hook around the waist band of my shorts before rolling them down just enough for him to pull my dick out over the top.

I could feel he was shaking as he was now laid over both my legs so I couldn’t roll away now unless I sat up and said something. Which I didn’t.

I opened my eyes, it was too dark for Ben to see my open eyes. All I saw was the silhouette of Ben leaning over my exposed cock. I felt a warm breath hit the under side of my shaft before again feeling him place his hand back around it, he rolled my foreskin down and gave the head of my cock and kiss. I jolted in bed which sent Ben flying back away from my cock. He was still laying across my legs tho so I couldn’t roll away.

He whispered my name, I said nothing. With my head tilted back I just slightly peaked at Ben as I saw him move back into position. Watched as the silhouette of his head got lower and lower and lower before all of a sudden the head of my cock was back sitting on his wet lips. I resisted the urge to jolt this time but I clenched my fists hard. He dropped his head forward allowing my head and about an inch of shaft to sink into his mouth. He brought his hand up and gripped the base of my cock to help steady it for what he was about to do.

After about a minute I could now feel Ben taking the entire length of me in his mouth, up and down up and down. My mouth was wide open as I was quietly heavily breathing into the dark.

I could feel my balls beginning to get tight and my shaft throb. All I could hear was Ben sucking and slurping. He was carelessly loud now as I’m guessing he assumed if I hadn’t woken yet then I wasn’t likely to. I have no idea how his mum couldn’t hear her son sucking his best friend’s cock next door, it was a very quiet house at 3am or whatever it was.

At this point I couldn’t hold it and let out a low whimper/groan. Ben heard this and knew I was close. He picked up the speed now, wanking the base of my cock and sucking the tip. I was about to cum in my best friends throat and I didn’t do a thing to stop it. I tensed my entire body as I shot rope after rope of my cum into Ben’s hot mouth, his tongue swirling around my head and shaft catching and mixing all my cum with his saliva. I let out another groan to which I saw Ben lift his head, I didn’t say a word and laid there motionless apart from my now heavy breathing. I heard Ben swallow everything that was in his mouth before watching him lean down and give one last pull on my cock to get the last of my cum out which it did, another drop landed straight on his lips.

He rolled my shorts back up then went to the bathroom. I could hear him wanking himself off. Again to this day how his mum heard none of this is beyond me. The wet noises of his cock being wanked before finally hearing him lose his breath as he came. I rolled over to my front, still semi hard admittedly from hearing ben wank. He walked back over to the bed got in and went to sleep.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? The next morning i woke up first so i went straight to the bathroom and locked the door. I washed all bens dry/sticky saliva off my penis before sitting down on the toilet just to process what happened, i let a guy suck my dick and didnt say a thing about it. Was i gay? Bisexual? I wasn’t sure now. My first sexual experience ended with a guy swallowing my cum.

I left the bathroom and Ben was gone, I could hear him talking with his mum downstairs. Ben’s mum said good morning and Ben grunted whilst eating some toast.

I let them know I was going to get going straight away (I lived a 5 minute bus journey from Ben) so i gathered my stuff and left.

I never staid at Ben’s again but that night did open my eyes to my bisexuality. I’m still friends 3 years later just not as close, I wonder if he knows I know.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None

What were your motives for this hookup? Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Not at all

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I never told anyone as i feared it would be confused as me being gay. Not even two ex girlfriends afterwards did i tell. Other than my first time saying it on here.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Do you regret this hookup? Somewhat

Why do you regret this hookup? I wish my friend didn’t betray my trust like that but it opened my eyes. I haven’t been with a guy since him but i’m open to it i suppose.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Sounds bad to say but the blowjob was good.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Betrayal of trust

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Not really

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? No

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? Be safe thats it

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Good site, like the anonimity

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!