What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 46
What’s your race/ethnicity? Hispanic / Latino/a
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? US, Fort Worth
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? Executive
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (open)
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 6
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

First MFM

How long ago did this hookup happen? 5 months

What was your relationship status at the time? Engaged/Married (monogamous)

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a month

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? M was a few years older than us, but he was in great shape. We did not know him very well other than through chatting and texting for a few weeks after meeting through AFF.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We finally decided to meet in person at a local hotel bar. If things went well we would get a room at the hotel.
We sat at the bar talking and having a drink. He started flirting with my wife from the beginning and casually touching her leg as we talked. Seeing that she did not object his touch when he went to the bathroom, I asked my wife if she wanted to go to the room to have more privacy.  She said ok, so when he got back I suggested going to the room to talk with more privacy. He agreed so we got a room.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We turned on some music in the room and he started dancing with my wife and kissed her neck as he touched her butt over her clothes. Then he kissed my wife’s neck and started to make out with her as his hands explored her body through her clothes. At the same time, he started to pull her dress up until he was able to feel the bare skin of her butt and then sliding his hand under her dress to feel her wetness. As he felt her, she unbuttoned his pants and slid her hand inside to feel him for the first time. After a few minutes they were naked and he guided her to the bed where they started to have sex. He and my wife had full intercourse for over 3 hours.

After he came in her for the first time my wife turned her attention to me and we started having intercourse while she gave him a blow job to get him hard again. After I came in her, it was his turn to have intercourse with her again. He tried to do anal intercourse and my wife hates anal. Since we had talked before that anal was not acceptable she ended the play after that.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat

Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? The next day was a little confusing especially because it ended kind of abruptly.

We decided at that time to not have this experience again.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Learning new things, experimenting

How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did you consume? Alcohol

How intoxicated was your partner? A little tipsy/high

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My wife and I talked about it

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Neutral

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit

Do you regret this hookup? A little bit

Why do you regret this hookup? I did not turn out as we expected

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Good sex for several hours but my wife was not able to have an orgasm

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? When the guy tried to start anal.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? We are.willing to try this experience again but with a different approach

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? Would like for casual sex for married people to be more accepted by society

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? A good way to learn others experiences

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!