What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 30
What’s your race/ethnicity? East Asian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Sweden halmstad
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Student
What’s your current relationship status? In a serious relationship (open)
Religious affiliation: New age movement
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 6
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
First Unexpected One-Night Stand in Amsterdam
How long ago did this hookup happen? 11 days
What was your relationship status at the time? In a relationship (open)
How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand
How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? A 24 year old hungarian man who works in the hostel during my two day visit to Amsterdam. First impression on him is that he is a very kind employee in the hostel. Asking and checking up on all the people who stay there. He is genuinely kind, not because he works there. A very enthusiastic employee someone i can trust. I met him in the kitchen of the hostel. I asked him if i have one day in Amsterdam where should i go, i asked the best direction to the airport and he showed me the bus station near the hostel. I also notice that he has very beautiful long eyelashes eye. Bright smile and he is fast, his movement is fast and firm. He was never idle, always doing something. Full of energy.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? No plan was previously made that we would hook up. I simply couldnt find the bus stop he showed in the free city map of the hostel so i wondered if he could take me there. He stops working at 5 so i told him im gonna go out and be back at 5 after that he can show me the way, before i left i asked him to help me charge the powerbank and he said he was going to give me a number. I thought he meant his phone number so i happily turned to the gay room mate friend and said “he’s gonna give me his number. Im gonna kiss him”. I ocassionally kiss people i like. Friendly kiss on the lips or french kiss if i bave some chemistry with the person during my solo travelling. In this case i meant i want to kiss him on the lips in a friendly kiss. I also told the guy “i dont like this hostel but i like you”. Later on, infound out he heard it when i said to my friend that i was going to kiss him. So i read into the signals and thought i hinted at him. I didnt know he could hear that.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? When i returned at 5. He took me to the bus stop to find out they loved it to another location. He walked around and looked for the bus stop for me as i was stressing out a bit. After we found it i asked him if he was going to go home. He said no i can take you to some places if u need. I was happy and said cool, if u have time. I was going to ask u if u can give me two favours. One is a selfie together coz i like you. Two is a french kiss. ( changed my mind after he helped me out enthusiatically) he said sure to both of the favours. We sat on a bank and talked. He found out i am 30 years old after a few guesses. He said his bday is soon coming. And he said he is an aries . As i am very big on horoscope signs reading. We talked about his ex who is one year younger than me and that he broke up with her a month ago. But they still live together in a room in a big house. He said he doesn’t have sex with her anymore and that he sleeps on the couch. We talked about self love, self improvement and i encourage him to be who he is and that he should love himself in order to find true happiness. It got cold so he asked if i wanted to come to his place. I said sure if you have hot tea. He said yes i have a lot of tea. I asked him is this far from here. He said about 15 mins by tram. I said i cant pay for tram because i have just enough cash for bus to the airport and dinner. He said he gladly pay for me. I tried to give him a kiss on the cheek and when he saw that he turned his head to catch my lips. I was shocked but flattered at the same time. We talked a lot on the tram and he said how could i be so mature for being 30. That he learnt a lot from me, other girls only talk about boring things, when we got out of the tram, he stopped on the way to the apartment and he apologized me for whats gonna happen. He then grabbed me and kissed me on my lips. I was very stiff but went on with it. After a minute of walking without saying anything, i realized he might expect more from this encounter so i said to him “D! I am not gonna fuck you. You can get a couple of kisses and thats it. I dont plan on having sex with you and if that is your main purpose here i can go home from now so we both can save time”. He said, don’t worry i wont try to do anything. We arrived at the place and i asked him to get me some hot tea and ice at the same time. He didn’t have ice but try to make some. I also notice that his pillow and blanket were placed on the sofa so i attest to the fact that he doesnt sleep on the same bed with the ex. He said she always use the fact that she came from hungary to amsterdam just for him and use it to tie him in this relationship. We talked and then he tried to kiss me. He forced his whole body on me and for one moment i felt suffocated in his arms and kiss. He tried to crawl his hands to grab my breast. At the same time he was kissing my neck passionately. I never touch his private part but i could feel that he had a hard on. So many time he tried to pull off my pants but i stopped him and said im sorry D. We stopped kissing and started talking again and when i got my lip balm and tried to apply it on my lips, he looked at me and said please let me help you wet your lips. Then he forced his body on me again with another passionate kiss. He tried at least five times to put his hands inside my pants but five times i pushed him away. The sofa hurt my back and he asked me if i want to lie down on the bed that he would give me a massage. I couldn’t believe i was so naive to trust his words. Anyway he found my weakest spot on my body. He succeed in taking off my top and caress my back. He asked me if i need some oil. I said yes and he start licking my back and said this is my oil. I got goose bump all over because the part under my neck was my arousal turn on spot. When he saw the goose bump he said your lips say no but your body say yes. Please give it to me. I want you badly. I turned around and thought for a moment. He will never stop and he was good at turning me on so wtf. I asked him if he has condom he said yes and then i asked for a towel. I took a shower and he did too and i waited for him on the bed naked. When he arrived he start kissing me from my feet and upward to my belly. He start licking me down there and we did the missionary position. It went on for around 5 minutes and then he finished it off. I asked for permission to go out for a ciggie and when he returned we talked a bit more than we wanted to have sex again. So this time we tried doggy style but of course he could not go on for long since i have a tight kitty and his thang is quite big. He apologized for not lasting as long as he wanted it to be but i totally understand. I was happy with his foreplay and kindness toward me anyway. We talked until 10 pm and we left.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? He took me to a restaurant and asked me what do i want, i specifically said dont order any drink for me as i have my water in my bag. He still ordered a bottle of tea , without honey as he knew i am a vegan. Since he works in the hostel he managed a free bed for me at the hostel when he learnt i would have to wait at the airport for 5 hours. Previously i didnt know there is night bus at 5 am in amsterdam. He was very generous and took care of every single detail. When we returned to the hostel he took me 5 meter away from the doorway and he said if we go inside the hostel now i could not kiss you. So please give me one passionate kiss. We kissed and when we came into the hostel, he took my luggage and change the sheet for my bed. He didnt want me to do anything but just stay with him and gracefully receive his service. He is truely very gentleman and i have much feelings for him. I hope to see him again if i go to amsterdam. Until now i still believe bis feelings toward me is genuine. I remember he said i knew u were very serious when you told me you would not have sex with me. But he was happy he didnt stop trying be ause he truely wanted me. He said i honeslty have not met anyone who could teach me so much about life in such a shirt period of time and tthat i am special to him because i am his first encounter who is not from Hungary. I also told him he is the youngest encounter i have ever had and also the first one night stand.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms
What were your motives for this hookup? Attraction to partner(s), Making new friends, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it, I didn’t want it but was unable to stop it
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Not at all
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave a clear ‘no’
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? I’m not sure / I don’t know
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? five close friends. Two were unsure it was a good idea. Three were somewhat happy that i enjoyed my time.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? That i was wanted and desired by a younger man. I have always been together with much older people because of the intellectual and mental compatibility, i changed my mins now that young boys can be very fun to be with . Enthusiatic , energetic and bouncy. i feel lucky to have met D as he was very generous, polite, respectful to me. He paid attention to details and pamper me in every way he Could. In no way i felt his kindness toward me was fake or just to get a one night stand. The way he took care of me and his gestures showed he had a crush on me. He liked to hold me hand, kissed my hand, played with my hair and held me close to him while we were on the tram. Very protective and caring.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? That i found myself so naive. I should have known that he expected to have sex with me if i am inside his cave. I bought it when he said he was just going to give me a massage. But he totally turned me on with all his foreplay.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I never had any judgement toward casual sex. Nor do i ever judge people with kinky sex needs. As long as there is consent between two adults, i have no objection or prejudice.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? That i should check horoscope sign before going to someone else house. Now that i learn aries horoscope sign and my libra horoscope sign have the strongest sexual chemistry and i cannot deny the fact that i was totally infatuated by his move and energy, if we are a couple a little adjustment to slow him down would make the best sex ever, as i notice i am running at speed 5 ans he is running at speed 10.
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? Casual sex is something good and not negative, i have polyamorous tendency so i do not highly believe that monogamous work. There is a tiny percentage of people in this world are perfectly fine with monogamous but the majority of us are more lean into polyamory tendency. It is not possible to have sex with only one partner for your entire life. Casual sex is not bad as long as two adult agree upon it and it causes no mental pain or traumatize any of the party. I dont mention physical pain because i know some people like bondage sex which is fine to me. I dont judge.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Great project would hope that more people participate.
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