What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 39
What’s your race/ethnicity? Southeast Asian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Netherlands
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? Business Analyst
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (open)
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 20
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
The flash Tinder quickie: from a match to goodbye in under 3 hours
How long ago did this hookup happen? 6 months
What was your relationship status at the time? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
How would you best classify this hookup? Fuck-buddies / Booty call
How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was 32 and looking cute on Tinder. He was good looking in real life too. I didn’t know much about him at all.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? While going through a difficult period in my relationship, I decided to give Tinder a try. I got several matches quickly, but on the second day, walking home from my pilates class, I matched with this guy and started to chat right away. He asked if we could meet up, and I said if he didn’t mind me going right after pilates, I could meet him in half an hour in a cafe nearby. He agreed to it.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? As this was my first Tinder date, I was so glad that he looked as good looking as his pictures. We connected right away, and after some beer and nibbles at the cafe, we started making out at the park nearby and he asked if we could go somewhere. My husband was away that afternoon, and I told him he could come to my house, but it had to be a quickie. So I took him home, where we undressed and went to bed and had sex straightaway. It felt so natural, with no awkwardness. It was impulsive and hasty, as quickies are, but it added an extra layer of excitement to the experience. He came, but couldn’t do another round after that, so he fingered me until I came. Then I told him he had to leave because my husband would be back soon.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? It was fun, in terms of novelty and excitement, and it was a great ego boost when I needed it because he kept telling me how gorgeous I was. But in terms of the quality of the sex itself, it was ok. He kept asking me for a repeat for some time, but I was never interested in seeing him anymore. I was more interested in meeting other new strangers from Tinder, which I did, and still do occasionally now. I have fond memories of this guy, but no particular feeling.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Learning new things, experimenting, To feel better about myself
How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Some friends, who fully supported my decision. Also my husband, who got somewhat upset, but also curious about the experience.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Mixed (Some positive, some negative)
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? The novelty, spontaneity and how easy it was.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? I wish the actual sex was better
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? It did open up the world of dating app for me and made me realize how easy it is for a woman to get casual sex from it.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
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