What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 50
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? Boston
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? Paramedic
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 6
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? None
Friend & Wife 1st Time
How long ago did this hookup happen? 10 years
What was your relationship status at the time? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
How would you best classify this hookup? Friends-with-benefits
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For more than 3 years
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? My wife, Amy is 5’3” about 140 38c. Cute type. We’ve been together about ten years. My best friend, Barry and I worked together but we’ve known each other for over ten years.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? It wasn’t plannned at all. Alcohol helped instigate it. Barry always hung at our house drinking and watching sports, something his wife really isn’t into. Barry and Amy always flirted and we’re very comfortable around each other.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We’d all been drinking a lot while watching baseball. Barry kept asking to see Amy’s boobs as she had flashed him in the past but tonight he kept asking and she kept flashing him. If they passed each other he’d grab her boobs for a second and both of them would laugh. This went on for awhile and he got up for another drink and asked to see her boobs again. When she lifted her shirt he went over and just took it off. She just left it off.
I was surprised but also very excited to watch. When Barry came back with his drink Amy said it wasn’t fair and he should take off his pants. Which he did immediately. So now my wife is topless and my friend has no pants on and is rock hard. He sat on the couch next to her and they started playing with each other. She jerked him off and he’d suck her nipples. She got up to get a drink but when she got back she sat on the floor in front of him, looked at me as if to ask permission, which I gave, and she gave him an awesome blowjob until he came in her mouth. She sat there for a little while playing with him and then told him he better get going. He looked disappointed but left.
We went to our bedroom and fucked liked crazy. She was super excited.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? When my wife and I talked about it, we were both fine with it partly because of the excitement it brought and partly because it was a friend we trusted.
The next time our friend was over he was a little nervous because he didn’t want to ruin the friendship. We told him we were fine. That we trusted him and Amy blew him again. This led to many more encounters.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Sterilization
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it
How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Somewhat
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but didn’t give a ‘no’
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Amy told a friend of hers who couldn’t believe it and wanted every detail.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? New, exciting, friend we trusted.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Didn’t happen sooner.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Yes, more open minded.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I think it is possible for even married people to have casual sex.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? It’s interesting to learn that there are many people like ourselves.
You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!