What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 23
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Amsterdam, Netherlands
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? student
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Anthroposophy
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? sassy, kinky, warm, playful, expressive
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 5
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 1
Getting it Out of the System
How long ago did this hookup happen? two months ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For 1 to 3 years
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was a guy that graduated in the same year in my university and we were friends before. We were in the squad of people that were not like the white upperclass students, we made a lot of music, went to jam sessions, smoked weed, had good conversations, turned up together. He was half from Curacao and very tall (basketball). I knew he was a bit in love with me and that he always wanted me. A few months before we had chilled together and had made out very intensively (we are both equally kinky), so there was some tension building up. Also he had kind of bragged about his ability to make a girl cum without touching her so I thought I would be in for a treat. But to be honest I was totally not attracted to him or interested in any relationship.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? It began with making out in a cafe and ended on a couch in the house of some of our friends which was super dirty and totally not welcoming or nice. Like a bunch of dude students. I had not have sex in 9 months so I just had to get it out of my system. I thought it would be good quality and it was my first one night stand.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? It was alright. Not special at all. He was a bit overwhelmed with my mojo and was not getting hard, still tried to put it in (epic turnoff). He fingered me (fingerfucked me and made me cum) and went down on me (boring). I was just feeling a bit badass because he was overwhelmed and I was having a one-night stand on someone’s couch. It was leather. Gross. It ended with him coming and throwing the condom on the floor (then looking for it because it was not our house and we had to hide it).
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? A little
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We cuddled and walked to the train, it was all good because we were also friends. I joked and said he was still in the friendzone. Totally not into any more hookups with him, not interested in any future with him. That was a totally unnecessary hookup even though I had a 9 month desert.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms, Birth control pill / patch / ring / injection / implant
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Thought it was an important experience to have, To cheer myself up, Boredom, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? A little tipsy/high
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Marijuana, hashish
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Friends and family. They laughed their ass off.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Do you regret this hookup? A little bit
Why do you regret this hookup? it was not necessary. It was lame, and I wasn’t really into it that much.
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Cumming.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? That he tried to put a limp dick inside me
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? yea it’s a bit lame when there is not enough chemistry or feels
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Somewhat negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? No, please, no. No more.
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? The first time was not hurtful because he was really into me and he liked me after it still. However it has also been hurtful and distracting, and made me act like a person that was only a shadow of the beautiful being I am. And all this just to get attention or feel wanted and loved. The real deal is worth the wait I think.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Love it.
You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!