What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 29
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Germany
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? Engineer
What’s your current relationship status? Dating casually
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 19
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 2
I Got My Mojo Back
How long ago did this hookup happen? 5 years ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For more than 3 years
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? My partner that night was the older sister of an ex-girlfriend and one of my female cousin’s best friends (rural areas, you know). From my perspective she’s quite attractive, but nothing that I would highlight in particular. We’ve know each other for years, but not been anything close yet were always getting along very well and luckily still do.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I want to give the whole picture here, to explain what makes this hook-up quite special for me.
I had my first girlfriend when I was 14 and we got serious pretty fast. I ended it after 2 years and had two other girlfriends after her, then got back together with my first girlfriend at age 19 (I thought I made the biggest mistake of my life splitting up with her in the first place). I was happy, but she cheated and we split up just before I turned 21.
I fell in a hole. I was cynical about relations and love, even women in general. Thought I was worth nothing, didn’t even make moves on other women, actually I felt sexually not interested at all in anyone. Of course I masturbated a lot but didn’t reflect the whole thing in any ways. At that time it never bothered me, but now it sort of does.
I was just about to turn 25 (so the phase was 4 years) when the hook-up happened. Like really, really accidentally. We were sharing a bed after a party, I was still in this cynical mood I just described and really drunk and didn’t expect anything to happen at all (guess that’s unusual for a 24 year old single man sharing a bed with an attractive single woman the same age). Anyways, at one point we were laying face to face, I could feel her breath but didn’t see her, since it was plain dark. She made little moves to get closer to me, while I was thinking, “Is this really happening?” So I moved a bit closer to her as well, when suddenly our lips touched (I think I just kissed her at some point) and it just happened.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We made out heavily, touching and grabbing each other at all places, hugging tightly, with me touching and grabbing her boobs and pussy while she was working on my dick. I basically just asked her, “Fuck?” and she said yes, so we took our clothes off and fucked missionary. From nowadays perspective the sex wasn’t spectacular at all. No oral, just missionary, and I came quite soon. No idea how long it took (but we were noisy, which a friend we slept over with told me later). We were both still very drunk, cleaned up the mess a little (we used no condoms, didn’t discuss the issue at all), and went to sleep.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one
Did your partner have an orgasm? No
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I drove her home next morning, we had a quick chat on how to deal with it and agreed on keeping it a secret but she told me that her sister told her I was pretty good in bed, and that she can confirm on this. Something I never considered or was told before. I deflowered all my girlfriends, so they had no comparison. But it was the ego-boost I needed.
That happened just before I went to the UK for 9 months for studying. I consider myself not too attractive, but I realized, it doesn’t matter (too much) if you bring the right attitude and deliver afterwards.
Long story short, it’s been almost 4 years since I got my “mojo” back and I really enjoy it. I’m exploring myself, my needs, kinky stuff, and I’m open minded about a lot of things and sexually very curious, etc.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, Intoxication
How intoxicated were you? Completely wasted
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Completely wasted
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? A fuck-buddy a few years later. She was happy for me.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I got my mojo back.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Being completely drunk.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? YES!
This hook-up led me to think about my own sexuality, needs, abilities. It showed me again how much fun sex can be. I consider this hookup very important for myself, the things I’ve done after this and the person I am now. I’m really glad it happened.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? Glad it happened!
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? Since then, I like the idea and I go for it, pretty much.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Got place to share and read some really hot stories.
You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!