What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 20
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? Berkeley, CA
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? Nanny
What’s your current relationship status? In a serious relationship (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 17
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
He Had Three Closets
How long ago did this hookup happen? 6 months ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand
How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was Spanish, with long curly hair and a tattoo he had gotten when he was 13. We had just met at the bar, where he bought me a shot of vodka and asked if I had read Junot Diaz (which I had). I was drunk enough to not realize he was a good three inches shorter then me. I asked if he wanted to go back to his place and he kissed me in response.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We kissed outside of the bar while waiting for the Uber. He drunkenly told me he was even more handsome with his glasses on (which he was). We took it back to his place, where he showed me his three closets, his huge cock (his words) and threw me onto the bed. After we had sex I looked through his bookcase and discovered that he had multiple womens studies texts, which, as a Womens Studies major made me happy about my choice in men.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? He called himself “nigga” multiple times during sex, as in “yeah, fuck a nigga like that”, which made me vaguely uncomfortable but I didn’t really care because I was drunk/high/he had a big penis. I didn’t come, but we switched positions multiple times, and smoked a joint while on top so it didn’t really matter. I didn’t expect to come in the first place.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? No, not even close
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We fell asleep, he woke up and grabbed my ass.
I had to leave the next day to go to Europe (cliche, but I was studying abroad) so he gave me his number and told me to call him when I was back in the states. 3.5 months later, upon returning from Prague I did, but he never replied.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, attraction to partner(s), thought it was an important experience to have, intoxication, to feel better about myself, power / dominance, everyone else was/is doing it, it was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did you consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish
How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My friends.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Smoking a joint while fucking him on top.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? He never texted me back.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? It gave me a positive experience, but as a result I expected my next one night stand to be as good (it wasn’t).
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I have been in 2 long term relationships since I was 14. I am 20 now, and in between these relationships I’ve slept with a lot of different men in a short amount of time. I am able to seperate sex from emotion, and have had multiple one night stands without getting hurt or “catching feelings”. However, I abstain from doing anything in these hookups that might project any romantic connotations, such as holding hands, prolonged kissing or cuddling. In essence, I fuck and leave.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? All about it, more research needs to be done on casual sex.
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