What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 27
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Scotland
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? Arts
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? With a preference for women
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 35 (I think)
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 2
Hooking Up With The Girl From Chicago
How long ago did this hookup happen? 8 years ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? Short fling
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than 6 months
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? When I was 18/19, I was working at Blockbuster, the only one in our city. Most of my coworkers were flatmates and all knew each other beforehand. One was at University and knew a girl who I’ll call R. She was a student who was originally from Chicago. She was 22 and had short brown hair with an slim body and curves in all the right places. I was attracted to her immediately but didn’t really think anything would come of it. Over the next month or so, I got to know her through hanging out with my coworkers and met her other friends as well.
One night, I was hanging with my coworkers (by this time I was actually living at their flat (apartment) over the summer) when R came in and asked if anyone wanted to go to the club, which was quite close. My coworkers declined, but I accepted, excited about the prospect of going to a club with R. We got to the club and had fun, the club part was pretty normal. Nothing really happened there.
It wasn’t until we were leaving when R’s other friend left us alone. We had a goodnight hug that turned into a kiss. We agreed to meet up the next day.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? The next day I had the flat to myself. I texted R and she said she would come over. I didn’t hear the door go but it was usually left open (it was a casual kind of flat) and R came into the room I was in. I can’t remember the specifics beforehand but I know we were talking for a bit, then started making out. I started kissing her neck and she suggested we go down to the room I was staying in.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? The room I was in had a single room. We quickly got down to making out and getting our clothes off. I had a condom and asked what position she’d like – I wasn’t that experienced at the time. She suggested doggy style and we started fucking with her head in the pillow while her legs were spread to the sides of the bed. She was quiet (at first) but let out a small moan as she came and I came shortly after.
We lay in the bed a bit chatting and touching each other. She gave me a hand job and in return, I fingered her to orgasm. After that, we got dressed and she went home. We agreed to meet again another time.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? As you can imagine I was really happy about getting to sleep with R who I’d been attracted to since we met. We ended up a FWB situation, or could have if I hadn’t misread. We had good sex for a about a week, and R started to get more vocal in bed, when I misread the situation and put that I was in a relationship online. R wasn’t looking for a relationship and though I would have been fine with a FWB situation she called it off. We still remained friends though, and I never made that mistake again.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Hoping or expecting it would lead to something more
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Our friends knew, but it was fine and nothing negative came about from it.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Neutral
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Getting to sleep with a girl I had a huge attraction to, and also I was still new to sex so it was good to have it regularly.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Thinking it was more and blowing the whole thing.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? No, if anything I think this is very positive. Plus it introduced me to FWB idea and also taught me not to overthink anything and a lot of the time just go with it.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? R ended up moving back to the States and I haven’t seen her since. We’re still facebook friends though.
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I think casual sex is a good thing, whether you’re single and just want to be free or are married but can’t get sexual gratification anymore but hopefully have an arrangement to explore other people.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I think this website is good for educating people. Hearing about how it can happen what it’s like. Not to mention they’re fun to read.
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