What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 25
What’s your race/ethnicity? Southeast Asian
What continent do you live on? Asia
What country and/or city do you live in? Philippines
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? Geologist
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Agnostic
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 8
Hooking Up With A Traveller
How long ago did this hookup happen? About a month ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status
How would you best classify this hookup? Fuck-buddies / Booty call
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a month
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? My partner is southeast Asian, about 184cm and has tanned skin from all his travels. I had only met him from tinder so I didn’t know much about him before. I was actually a bit hesitant to meet him because he could be anyone. He tried to assure me by showing a video of his travels. We also texted for a couple of days about our sexual experiences prior to hooking up.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? It was my partner who instigated it. He asked why I’m on tinder. I sort of beat around the bush and told him I just want to meet new friends. Then he went straight ahead and tell me he just wants to have fun and fuck people. I guess I was longing for sex at the time so I agreed to fuck him.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? The first time that we hooked up we only did a long foreplay and oral sex. I had my period then which I told him prior. We pretty much agreed to keep penetration off limits at least only during that hook up. I agreed to him fingering my vagina and I gave him fellatio. The succeeding hookups involved penetration.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat
Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? After the hookup, he was nice enough to thank me thru text. I was kind of busy at the moment with some projects so I wasn’t really able to respond soon.
We agreed to keep everything casual so I’m not really expecting anything other than a booty call. Recently though I seem to be developing a sort of attachment to him.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms, No penetrative sex happened
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, To feel better about myself, To feel more desirable, To feel more confident, To cheer myself up, I was feeling lonely, Boredom, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I only reached out to my closest friend whom I had known since primary school. She was surprised but was supportive. She just advised me to be safe and asked some juicy details which I happily shared with her.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? My hookup was friendly enough to carry a conversation and straightforward enough to clarify what we are doing: that it’s just a hookup and we should leave our feelings at the door.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? He smokes and although he promised to make me cum, I didn’t think I came.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I feel a bit more confident because my partner complimented me during sex.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? Casual sex can be convenient for people who are curious about their sexuality but are too afraid to go out there and be in a more serious and committed romantic relationship. As long as it’s between two consenting adults who are certain with their decisions there is no harm in casual sex. No one should shame anyone for engaging in casual sex.
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