What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 20
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Albania/Tirana
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Student
What’s your current relationship status? Dating casually
Religious affiliation: My religion is called Bektashi and is kind of a branch of Islam but without all the restrictions.
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 5
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
Music and Alcohol
How long ago did this hookup happen? A month ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status
How would you best classify this hookup? Fuck-buddies / Booty call
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a month
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He is extremely good-looking and not only by my standards. To be honest he is a decent human being with whom I really enjoy having different conversations from time to time(we still talk from time to time). He is best friends with my best friend’s brother (I kind of hooked up with him too but this story I’ll share another time). So we already had kind of a common circle and this helped because I knew he had asked around for me often I must add but the fact he hadn’t come up to me made him even more appealing and sexy in a mysterious kind of way. I take pride in being a woman that is not scared of making that first move. We would see each other for like every Friday and Saturday night for 3 weeks in a row at a new bar that had just opened in town. We did exchange looks and smiles and I was surprised he had been unaccompanied all this time because he had a reputation of always being with someone new so that made me wonder. What he made me feel was desired and wanted but not loved and I really felt attracted toward him not in an “I wanna take care of you” way but “I wanna rip your clothes” way.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We had met long before that bar I said before. often at nightclubs or different events. we are both involved in a social life and well known from our towns society since we do live in such a small town. he had often initiated a conversation but I would always shut him down because I knew he was seeing someone (different someone every 2 weeks). not that I cared but I never interfere in other women relationships (long or short term). At this new club, we both knew the owners and I would go there every week more as a favor but I started liking the place and he was there so that worked. At this point, I might have been a little obsessed but in a good kind of way. After he had been alone for some time I went at his table and said Hi so we started talking, pretty sure he knew why so acted like we knew each other and we had a pretty decent conversation. We were outside and he kissed me then was simply waiting for my reaction. I kissed him back and next thing I know he was touching me everywhere and I loved it. We headed back inside where our friends where but seated next to each other without touching.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? I was wearing a skirt so he would have easy access. There were three people who could simply look down and see that his hand was under my skirt, fingering me in a bar full of people. Honestly, I should have been a little more worried but maybe the fact that I had drunk a little and the fact that it actually felt great having him do that, I didn’t care if someone noticed. At one point I was so wet and he knew it so he simply got up and went to the bathroom, without even looking at me. I finished my drink in an instant and followed. the moment I opened the door he just grabbed me and we started heating up. I took off my clothes and he was all over me. At some point, he kind of put his hand on my head and wanted me to go down on him, somehow I didn’t mind (I had never given a blow job before) I loved it. I felt in control. Then he pulled out a condom from his pocket and put it on, we had vaginal sex, I didn’t feel like trying bj and anal both within 20 min. I did have and orgasm and I was all sweaty and he came like 2 min after me and that was like perfect because we both got what we wanted. I must say he was kind of violent but that made me even horny, he choked me and pulled my hair, and closed my mouth. It felt good, me not being in control, actually, me being in somebody else’s control. So we both finished, got dressed, cleaned up. he said he was looking forward to our next time and that he hoped this would happen again and again and again.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? He kissed me and we met with our friends, said good night (at 4 o’clock) and headed home. I felt nothing really, but I was happier probably because of the sex. I simply see him as someone I can have sex with and dont need to give my love and attention. I still talk to him every time I see him and there’s flirting.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Intoxication, To cheer myself up, Submission / Relinquishing power, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did you consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish
How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My best friend. She was very supportive and happy because she likes him.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? the sex, and me discovering I am not all vanilla.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? The fact it happened in a bathroom even though it was the cleanest bathroom one can have sex in outside his house.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? yes, it has. i’ve always been okay with casual sex. didn’t judge but after him, I don’t mind having casual sex more often.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I think sex makes people happy. I know so many people who NEED sex so casual sex should not be a negative thing, should not be punished or called out as a mistake. Sex is sex and making love is far from sex. People need to seperate this two different concepts.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? all I can say is that I feel somehow better sharing this with you.
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