Current location: Pennsylvania
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
Occupation: College professor
Relationship status: Single
Religious affiliation: Methodist
How religious are you? Very
Sexual orientation: Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 22
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
New Year’s Eve
How long ago did this hookup happen? 5 months
How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? One-night stand
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I knew Rev. “Amy” from my involvement in our church’s young adult group. She’s the pastor of our church. She’s very cute–tall, with long dark brown hair she usually wore in a bun or ponytail. Occasionally she wears glasses. She is about my age but looks younger. She’s married with two young children. I admired her for her intelligence, good humor and compassion. We knew each other for several months, but our encounters were brief.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We found ourselves together on New Year’s Eve. The church’s young adult group was having a party in the church’s Fellowship Hall, and a lot of alcohol was being consumed (I don’t drink). Rev. Amy was there by herself; her husband was home watching the kids. It became apparent that she had too much to drink–she was quite tipsy. I was sitting on a couch along the wall when Amy sat down right next to me, her leg pressed up against mine. As we talked, I could smell alcohol on her breath. She soon put her hand on my thigh and moved in even closer to me. I started to get aroused. She undid her ponytail and leaned in to kiss me, then whispered, “I’m up for hooking up tonight.” She suggested we go to the vestry behind the sanctuary. We then got up and excused ourselves from the party.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? When we got to our old church’s vestry, we immediately started making out. The alcohol on her breath was almost overwhelming, but we continued to french kiss. I unbuttoned her blouse and unclasped her bra; I rubbed her breasts and felt how hard her nipples were. She undid her long skirt and let it drop to the floor. I guided her to the couch and asked her to lie down. Then I pulled down her panties, got in between her legs and started to perform oral sex on her. After this, I sat up as Amy got on the floor. She crawled between my legs and performed oral sex on me. Then she jumped on the couch and straddled me as I entered into her. She’s an energetic lover; her body convulses during sex. She’s also pretty noisy: lots of moaning and crying out, “Oh, God!” in her girlish voice. She was so loud, I thought that we might get caught. After that, I lifted her off me and guided her to the edge of the couch. I bent her over, got behind her and fucked her until I climaxed. I didn’t feel much other than sheer arousal during the event. Afterwards, we cuddled on the couch a while. I started to feel somewhat depressed. “I have to get home,” she said softly. She was in no condition to get behind the wheel, so I drove her home. We didn’t talk during the drive, only a perfunctory “Happy New Year” when I dropped her off at her house.
Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? I had an orgasm during intercourse. Amy had an orgasm when she received oral sex.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? We didn’t take any precautions regarding STIs or pregnancy.
What were your REASONS for having this hookup? I admit that when Amy presented me with an opportunity to hook up with her, I found it tough to resist. Whatever moral objections I may have had disappeared when I was heading for the vestry with her.
Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? I don’t know how much Amy drank at the party, but it affected her considerably.
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? The next couple times we met at church, our interactions were extremely awkward. We didn’t talk about our hookup, but I could tell she felt ashamed over what she did–she blushed during one of our halting conversations. I also found it hard to hear her preach during service or teach Sunday school after we had sex. I still feel fondly toward her, but I ended up leaving her church.
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I didn’t speak to anyone about the hookup. It embarrassed me. Also, Amy could potentially be disciplined or removed from her position by the church if word of our encounter got out.
Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? The night of the event, I started to worry about how appropriate my actions were. I was certainly a willing participant, but Amy was pretty much drunk. I can’t imagine her behaving the way she did if she were sober. I’m afraid that I took advantage of her.
Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? I regret the hookup. I had sex with a married woman who was my pastor at the time, which violates my beliefs. I also fear that Amy was so intoxicated that she was incapable of truly consenting to having sex. It also led to my departure from a church community where I had developed some good friendships.
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? The best thing about the hookup was the sex–it was really hot. The worst thing was the guilt I felt afterwards about what I had done. It’s led me to believe that casual sex is something I should avoid. It also has made me question my character.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Fairly negative
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