Age: 38/19 Then
Current location: Columbus, OH
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
Occupation: Personal Trainer
Relationship status: Committed
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? A little
Sexual orientation: Bisexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexual orientation/sexuality better/best? Bi with a preference for men
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 40+
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? Three
How long ago did this hookup happen? 19 Years
How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? Casual Relationship
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I met JJ at a bar, she was a pretty blonde in her early twenties a few years older than me. She was tall and toned and had a nice chest and a few tattoos. I was instantly attracted to her when we met. We were also both in the Army.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I need to share a bit of background with this one. I was young and in the Army, and struggling a bit with my sexuality. I had been sexually active since early high school, and found I was attracted to both men and women and had slept with both, but I had only been with one other woman before JJ.
Now the Army had not been my first choice, but it was one of the few ways out of the small town where I grew up and there had not been money for me to go to college. It was a strict, rigid environment so when I got a weekend liberty pass to get off base I wanted to cut loose.
I was underage but had a fake ID and checked out a few bars. I heard about this lesbian bar and ended up there the second day of my liberty. I donned a tight little dress and thong, I was dealing with a breakup at the time and I think on some subconscious level looking to get laid.
I went to the bar and it was as advertised. There were a lot of women there, and a number of them offered to buy me drinks. I let a few, chatted with a few but didn’t really click with anyone. JJ came up to me, I remember she was dressed a lot more conservatively than me but was intelligent and charming. We flirted a bit and I remember her rubbing my thigh under the table. We kissed and I asked if she wanted to go back to my hotel room, and she agreed.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We were all over each other, kissing and feeling each other. Clothes came off and I was quickly able to identify that JJ was also in the Army from a tattoo on her arm and she admitted she recognized my unit tattoo on my left shoulder. We made out naked for a long time until JJ moved onto my breasts. She played with them a little while fingering me. She ate me until I had an orgasm.
JJ wanted me to do the same for her, but I had never done this before. She talked me through it a bit, and I was eventually able to get her to orgasm as well. We both fell asleep after.
Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? We both did.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? Didn’t really worry about it but we did discuss it after.
What were your REASONS for having this hookup? I wanted to and was attracted to JJ.
Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? I had a few cosmos and I think JJ also had a few drinks, a little buzzed and to the point I think inhibitions were removed a bit.
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? In the morning we woke up, kissed a bit before getting dressed and we exchanged numbers and made plans to meet up again before kissing goodbye. We casually dated for about a year or so, but with both of us being in the Army it was hard. JJ was senior enough she had private quarters so we usually met up there when I could get away.
Now I am proud of my service but the Army was not a great place for someone struggling with her sexuality. Don’t ask don’t tell was in strict enforcement so JJ and I had to always be discreet and were only able to date when off base and away from other soldiers. About a year after we started hooking up JJ was transferred overseas and we split up. It was hard and I cried a bit, looking back I had feelings for her, and maybe in a different environment it could have turned serious.
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? As I said, Don’t ask Don’t tell was in strict enforcement so to protect both of us I didn’t tell anyone for years. I did once tell a girlfriend who was a bit more supportive than I thought.
Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? Yes for both of us
Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I really enjoyed the sex and got to explore my interest in women, worst part was being in an environment where I was forced to keep it so secret. This hookup did change my views on sexuality quite a bit,
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative
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