What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 53
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? UK
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? Engineer
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Curious
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 5
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
How long ago did this hookup happen? Ongoing….
What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status
How would you best classify this hookup? Friends-with-benefits
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For more than 3 years
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? Gorgeous, 20 years younger than me, known quite well and always admired from afar. Work together now.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? Minibus trip to a rugby match in London. We sat together and drank a fair amount; flirted a little. On the way home, drank a little more and I admitted that I had liked her for a while.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? After admitting that I liked her, she was surprised. Her reaction made me bolder and I touched her knee and asked what she would do if I did this, did she like it? It was dark and we were travelling on the motorway. I moved my hand further up under her dress and touched her thigh. She opened her legs wider and I touched her pussy – she had no panties on!! I was utterly amazed. She was so wet that I had to finger her – 2 fingers, hit her G spot and she rode my fingers for a few minutes. But we were not alone and it was becoming obvious so we stopped. She gave me her panties from her bag and I kept them. Later she explained that she had just gotten turned on – horny – earlier in the day and had worried that her panties smelled of sex so she removed them – that nothing was planned.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? No, not even close
Did your partner have an orgasm? No
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We have started an affair. We are both married to other people.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, Hoping or expecting it would lead to something more, To feel better about myself, Power / Dominance, Boredom
How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? A little tipsy/high
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Not at all
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Haven’t told anyone except you…
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Somewhat
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Somewhat
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Ongoing sex is incredible – the hook-up opened her eyes to a relationship with an older but virile man.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? The deceit
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Yes. Before this, I thought that my sex life was over. Never thought I’d be intimate with another woman again. Never experienced oral sex like this before. She loves anal too but that takes planning…
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Very negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? Nope
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? Needs to be allowed to happen but need to minimise the hurt.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Not really thought about it…
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