Location: Barcelona, Spain
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (currently pursuing)
Occupation: Events Manager
Relationship status: Single
Religious affiliation: None
How religious are you? Not at all
Sexual orientation: Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 9
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? None
How long ago did this hookup happen? 5 months ago
How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? One night stand turned into booty call.
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? This guy wrote me on Ok Cupid. His profile was empty except from his photo, and he sent me a message telling me a bit about himself: Irish, 32, working and living in Barcelona for 3 years, laid back, happy person. We messaged each other for a couple of weeks. In his last message, he asked me out for a coffee or a drink, left his phone number and deleted his profile. A few days later I wrote to him and we started messaging on WhatsApp. I had googled his OK Cupid username and found him on YouTube, where I found his name and looked him up on Facebook. I found him and he looked like a really nice fellow, very handsome and friendly.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? Obviously we wanted to meet, so after chatting for a few days we agreed to meet one night after my acting class, at a bar that was right next to my school and happened to be in his neighbourhood. He met me right outside my class and he was SO handsome. Tall and built, reddish and curly hair, beard, blue eyes. I never liked a guy in a beard before. We went into the bar and started talking and drinking and just had the nicest time. We had to leave because the bar closed and went into another one for one more beer. I was very tipsy and realized that the subway had already closed and I had to go home on the night bus. I kept looking at my google maps but just couldn’t find where I was supposed to take the bus. So he offered me a couch in his place so I could sleep and then go home first thing in the morning. I hesitated for like a millisecond haha. I wasn’t sure I was going to have sex with him, I was just open to possibilities!
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We got into his flat, and we went to the terrace, which happened to be outside his bedroom. We started kissing very passionately, it felt really nice. Then we went inside and started undressing and all that. I was a bit self conscious, because I wasn’t expecting to have sex and I hadn’t shaved or anything. We had straight normal sex, there was no oral from either, but that was ok. I guess maybe oral is a bit more intimate, and we had just met, even if it sounds contradictory! The only kind of kinky stuff was that he kept sticking his finger in my ass while we fucked. It was ok, I’ve had anal before, but he didn’t work his finger right, and I wasn’t liking it, so I asked him to stop. He was very nice, so he did. The sex was pretty awesome, I climaxed several times (I hadn’t had sex in over a year). His dick was HUGE and it kind of hurt when we did it the second and third time, but it was still enjoyable. I slept over and it was overall a nice experience.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? He used a condom each time we did it. We did not discuss STD history.
What were your REASONS for having this hookup? Well, I wanted to meet someone new. I’m in a new city, having been involved in long term relationships in the past, and one very intense and tormented long-distance relationship with a married man which tore me apart. I felt adventurous and this guy and I really clicked. Not in a romantic kind of way, but it felt very natural, very friendly and we were attracted to each other. It’s odd for me, because normally I wouldn’t have sex with a man whom I don’t have any feelings for. And even after we had sex I didn’t end up in love with him or anything. It was just straight up fun sex with a good-looking, nice guy.
Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? There was plenty of alcohol, although I was completely conscious and aware of my actions. I was not wasted and did not pass out.
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I had never ever had sex with a stranger before, but he gave me a good vibe and I went with it. In the morning, he had to go to work so we got up really early, got dressed and went to the subway together. I left on my stop and he kissed me quite passionately goodbye. We are still in touch and have gotten together again once. I do not have expectations about him. He’s a nice guy, very busy and I’d like to keep in touch with him for more sex in the future.
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I told most of my friends. They were all very happy I had finally gotten laid haha!
Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? Yes, definitely consensual and wanted for both.
Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? Not at all. It’s amazing the things that can happen when you trust your instincts.
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? The best thing was that the sex was great, it felt natural, not awkward at all, and I felt like I was treated with respect and cared for as a person. This guy could have been a real jerk and he was the complete opposite. We gave each other great pleasure and we were nice to each other afterwards.
I discovered I am capable of casual sex, something I had never done in the past. But still for me, there has to be at least some chemistry and good vibe going on, I couldn’t just fuck some guy just because he’s hot.
And I discovered that, when I don’t have any expectations or I’m not worrying whether the guy likes me or not, I can really lose myself and be quite inhibited. And we both liked that.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
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