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What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 24
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? US
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual

Old Friends

How long ago did this hookup happen? Less than a week

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? Friends-with-benefits

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For more than 3 years

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup?

An old friend I’d known for about 8-9 years from high school. We’d kept in touch and we’ve always been close as friends. Back in high school, we’d make out and shit occasionally but it never went anywhere, which seemed just like a friendly exploration. This probably would have happened sooner if we’d both been single for a stretch. We’ve both always been comfortable talking about sex and sharing about casual sex experiences.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it?

We’d been chatting and smoking for hours at his place and his friend had just left. He asked if I wanted to make out and I said yes, but only if we moved to the bed. While he was getting a glass of water or something, I slipped off my pants, feeling sort of bold. After making out for a bit he asked what I wanted from this. My answer was basically “anything but check in with me as we go.”

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end?

Overall it was great. He was good at communicating and paid attention to the way that my body responded etc. He started by fingering me and it was seriously great but I had a hard time reaching orgasm, despite feeling really close for a long time. He was really comfortable with himself and I felt really comfortable with myself, and I was really into it. He was awesome at checking in and ensuring consent, so eventually, I felt confident enough to just say “let’s fuck.” He went to put a condom on but I teased him and sucked his dick a little bit beforehand. We fucked in missionary, and again it was good and I was really into it but couldn’t cum, not sure why. He asked if he could cum in a frantic voice and I could tell that it was probably inevitable so I said yes. After pulling out we laid together and talked and watched the sunrise.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now?

We walked to my car together and chatted about it briefly but we also had tons of other stuff we wanted to talk about. It felt really natural like it wasn’t something that really needed to be addressed between us.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness. Learning new things, experimenting. Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection. To feel more confident. It was easy/convenient.

How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did you consume? Marijuana, hashish

How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Marijuana, hashish

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? So far no one

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Honestly it came after having a really shitty casual sex experience where I felt really pressured into it and didn’t get ANY satisfaction out of it, so the best thing this did for me was reassuring me that good, consensual sex was possible and that I wasn’t doing something wrong to have gotten into that situation. It also felt really fucking good.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Couldn’t cum

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Casual sex with friends can be great because you already have practice with each other’s communication styles.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!