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What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 32
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? Canada
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
Religious affiliation: Agnostic
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 19
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

Older Man From POF

How long ago did this hookup happen? 2 weeks ago

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I am a recently separated, big, beautiful woman. My marriage was only a year old before I found out my husband was cheating on me. So I decided to leave him. After a month or so a friend convinced me to try out POF dating site. I had my misgivings about trying online dating. I had low self esteem about being a big beautiful woman and thought that men didn’t find that attractive. One day I received a message from “Dan”, who was older than me. I wasn’t sure whether to reply or not as he was 21 years older than me, the same age as my parents. But I read that he was also separated and interested in bigger women. He was just looking to chat and make new friends as he wasn’t ready for a relationship yet. I decided to reply and we chatted for a few days. He asked me if I’d be interested in meeting for coffee one day. I was a bit nervous, but I agreed. What I met was a well dress person who didn’t look his age. He was tall, average build and very polite. We decided to stay in touch and maybe meet again.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? After the meet up we kept in touch by texting each other. This went on for about a 2-3 days. On the weekend he was suppose to have his son. But something came up and he was alone. So we were texting on a Saturday evening and I mentioned how I find weekends lonely sometimes. As most of my friends are married with children now. He told me that I wasn’t the only one who feels lonely on weekends. That he understood how I felt. After a couple of messages from him trying to raise my spirits, something came over me, and I texted him saying “How about we help each other with the loneliness. I know I can use it. wink*wink”. Of course with any guy, you don’t have to ask twice.I was driving over and all of a sudden I got nervous. What was I doing? Would I go through with it? Was I really going to have sex with someone that much older than me?

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? I arrived at his place and he greeted me, and offered me a drink. We chatted and I took what seemed like 2 sips of the beer he gave me, before we started kissing. It wasn’t long before he was touching my breast above my shirt. He slowly started unbuttoning my top and took my bra off. I heard him whisper “wow”. I don’t think I was meant to hear it. But I asked him, “What?” He said, “They’re beautiful.” I’m a 44D by the way. This made me feel really good. I was a little nervous once again about being bigger. We slowly moved to the bedroom, as I took his shirt off. By the time we got into the bedroom I undid his pants and started preforming oral on him. Next it was my turn as my pants and panties went off and he went down on me. It was the most amazing oral that I had in a long time. Eventually we moved on to actual sex. I spent the night and we went 3 rounds total. I hadn’t had that in many years. During one of our breaks he told me how he was surprised such a beautiful woman would be interested in such an older guy.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? As this only recently happened, I’m hoping we meet up again. I’m not really interested in a relationship. But would love another hookup. We are still chatting.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, To feel more desirable, To feel more confident, To cheer myself up, I was feeling lonely

How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it

What substances did you consume? Alcohol

How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Somewhat

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My friend. She knew right off that something had happened. She was happy for me for moving on and wanted details.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I felt less lonely. I felt better about me personally. Age shouldn’t be a factor at times. I got lucky…lol.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Nothing

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Yes, there are men attracted to big beautiful women.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Interesting place to get things off my chest.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!