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What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 26
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Germany
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? Manager
What’s your current relationship status? In a serious relationship (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 6
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

One Night Stand in Paris

How long ago did this hookup happen? 8 Years ago,

What was your relationship status at the time? Single

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I was travelling through Europe and was alone in a hostel in Paris. I strolled the streets when I found a band of 4 guys playing on the street next to Montmartre Cathedral. I sat down on the pavement and watched them for a while. After they finished playing, I told them I was alone in town and asked if I could join them for a drink. They agreed and I got to know that they were all brothers, from Denmark and living in New York while doing street music. I wasnt especially interested in any of them, but they were fun to hang out with.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We later went to their friend’s apartment to have another drink. I had just finished high school and broken up with my boyfriend 2 weeks before, so I was up for new experience but didn’t think anything would happen. At that time, I had had sex with 3 ex-boyfriends, so I was open for a one-night stand. I was amazed by their stories of living as street musicians and one of the guys (I don’t even remember his name) started flirting a bit with me. He told me he was 28, so 10 years older than me which was a bit awkward. Later on, he offered to bring me back to my hostel, which was close by. On the way there he started to kiss me and we made out in the streets of Paris.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? When we reached the hostel, he brought me to the 4th floor, where my room was. We sat down on the stairs, talked and kissed a bit more and he started to touch me and unbutton my blouse. I felt that he was getting hard, but didn’t dare to touch him. He saw that there was a toilet in the hallway and entered (since the rooms had bathrooms, it was basically unused). He quickly pulled down his pants and asked me to blow him, so I did. A bit later, he sat down on the toilet, pulled out a condom from his pants, put it on and we started to have sex. It wasn’t the best sex I’d had to date, but it was my first one-night stand and exactly what I needed after my breakup

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat

Did you have an orgasm? No, not even close

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? After the hookup, he wished me a good night. We exchanged contacts and texted a bit, but not for long. I fantasized about a crazy future living in New York with a Musician, but only for a little while. I always saw it as a really fun experience and never felt bad about it.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms, Birth control pill / patch / ring / injection / implant

What were your motives for this hookup? Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Thought it was an important experience to have, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it

How intoxicated were you? A little tipsy/high

What substances did you consume? Alcohol

How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My best friend right after, she thought it was a cool story. I shared it with some more people in the years after.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I was immediately over my ex-boyfriend (1-year relationship)

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? It was on a toilet

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? It made me feel more sexual and open for more experiences

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I still feel a strong stigma around it and feel like it should be kept secret. Besides that, I like it

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Love reading it

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!