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What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 31
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (open)
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Bisexual recovering sex addict
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 55+
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 25

Reigniting an Old Flame

How long ago did this hookup happen? Five months

What was your relationship status at the time? Engaged/Married (monogamous)

How would you best classify this hookup? Fuck-buddies / Booty call

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For 1 to 3 years

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I’ve written about Shelly before, in “Big Booty + Molly=Fun”. She is middle eastern, BBW with a great big ass and sensual eyes. After that encounter, we had fallen out and stopped seeing each other. I knew that she had been dating someone for a while and that it had been serious, but she still seemed to pop up once in a while. One night, after not having talked to her for over a year, she messaged me out of the blue on Facebook. I was surprised to hear from her.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? In conversation, she professed her love for me and said that she had been fantasizing about me ever since we stopped seeing each other. She said that sex with her (recently ex) bf never measured up and that she never felt th kind of pleasure and connection with him that she had with me. This was a huge turn on for me, because if anything gets me hard instantly, it’s a compliment to my sexual ability. We decided we would be hooking up sometime and one day, I was on the road for work and was in her area. So I called her and asked to come over and fortunately, she was around.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? I came to the door, nervous as fuck, because I hadn’t cheated on my wife yet. But once she opened the door, it eased my fears because it reminded me of how amazing our sex used to be. I started kissing her and taking her clothes off immediately. We kissed like lovers, like old times. She was apprehensive because she said she had strep throat. I was already committed and wasn’t about to back down. I laid her down on the couch and began to make my way to her shaved pussy. I looked up at her and said “I can’t get strep by doing this can I?” She laughed and sheepishly said “maybe, I don’t know.” I continued with my work anyway and began to lick her clit up and down until she came, squirming and squeezing my face between her thighs. I then flipped her over to fuck her from behind so I could admire that incredible ass. I spanked it and bounced it back and forth on my shaft as I slid in and out of her dripping wet pussy. Finally after several more minutes I came inside her.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? It wasn’t the most satisfying hookup ever. In fact, I think it turned me off from it for at least a long while. I had some time soon after the hookup that I had told her she could come over and spend the night at my place. But after this hookup, I decided it wasn’t worth it and I cancelled. She was pissed as she felt like I had just used her for a quick hit. Which is probably actually true. It sucks that I wasted my sobriety on a disappointing attempt to recapture old magic. Since then, I haven’t even attempted to hookup with any women. Men are a different story, but my wife is fine with me seeing guys anyway.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Birth control pill / patch / ring / injection / implant

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, Thought it was an important experience to have, To feel better about myself, To feel more desirable, To feel more confident, Power / Dominance, Didn’t want to disappoint my partner

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? A little bit

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Nobody but you fine folks.

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit

Do you regret this hookup? A little bit

Why do you regret this hookup? It was a betrayal of my wife’s trust and it wasn’t worth the guilt I felt afterwards.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Her ass, as always.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Breaking my sobriety and falling off the wagon for something that wasn’t ultimately worth it.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? It made me realize that I might just be over the days of random hookups and mind games that come with casual sex with women.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I think casual sex is healthy, if people are open and honest about it and about their expectations. I often wish my wife would be willing to do an open relationship where I could fuck women, but then I remember that women have such a hard time seperating their romantic feelings from sexual desires.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? It’s fantastic and more people should read it.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!