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What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 33
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? New Orleans, Louisiana
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? Lawyer
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Agnostic
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? no
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? around 35
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? none until now

Russian Rock Star

How long ago did this hookup happen? three weeks ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He is from Russia and has been living in the states for only 6 years. He is very tall with a thick Russian accent. I first noticed him onstage when his punk band played in my town. My best friend is friends with the band and took me along to the show/hang out with them. He plays the accordion and has really hot/broad shoulders from it. Also he wears combat boots onstage, which is even hotter. And he has these piercing blue eyes. I just remember watching him onstage and thinking, YUM.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? To my disappointment, he didn’t come out with the rest of the band after the show that first night I saw him in the US. But after I found him on facebook and bravely just told him I thought he was hot. He was flattered. Then we found out his band would be on tour and in the same part of Italy my friend and I were going to on vacation in a month. He asked if I wanted to meet up with him in Italy on his day off before one of their shows, which also happened to be his birthday and I enthusiastically agreed. Once we were in Italy, my friend and I rented a car and drove to the city they were playing in. I texted him when I arrived and he met me in his hotel lobby. He gave me the most intense hug hello and practically lifted me off the floor, smiled and said how glad he was that I came to see him. We chatted over drinks in the lobby for the first time and actually hit it off pretty well. Then we got dinner and I proceeded to help him get drunk on his birthday, which involved him carrying me through the streets of this Italian city when my feet hurt from walking. At a bar we started making out like teenagers with a lot of tongue and ass-grabbing while his bandmates made fun of us. It was really cute and fun.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? Eventually we went to his room and he asked if I wanted to shower, which I did. He just liftedme and carried me into the shower and the nproceeded to go down on me like an absolute pro. I watched him do it in the mirrored wall of the shower. He complimented my ass a lot, which I am also quite proud of and it made me feel really good. He carried me out of the shower and threw me on the bed and he kept going down on me, even giving me a rim job, which I haven’t experienced a lot but felt really good and kinky. Then he tried to fuck me without a condom, but I firmly told him no. He laughed and said tehat must be the lawyer in me and quickly put one on. The actual intercourse was not as fantastic as I thought it would be because his penis was smaller than most of the men I’ve been with, but the great oral more than made up for that. Then he came and he grabbed me with his amazing arms and it was like he was enveloping me and groaning really loud. It was totally hot to watch. After, we had an inetersting conversation about attraction and cuddled and fell asleep. We fucked again in the morning and we made out in the lobby before we said goodbye. We told eachother we had a good time. I didn’t know if I would see him again.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? The next day I felt pretty elated about the whole thing because of how fun it was and I was proud of myself for going after the person I wanted. but I was also hoping I might hear from him again, mostly to stroke my own ego and also because hooking up again in some foreign city or even my own town would be fun. I am just out of a three-year monogamous relationship, so part of me was like, wait am I being a “ho”? But then I realized that I had anted this and decided to own my decision and not label myself like society likes to label women who enjoy casual sex. I didn’t hear from him the next three weeks, but then he contacted me on facebook and asked how I was doing and that he had been thinking about me the other night. We proceeded to have a really fun sexting convo full and I made him promise that if we ever meet up again he would fuck me with his combat boots still on. We have loose plans to see eachother when his band tours the south later this year. It’s fun to think about! I feel like he’s a fun/sexy acquaintance.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, To feel more desirable, To feel more confident

How intoxicated were you? A little tipsy/high

What substances did you consume? Alcohol

How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My best friend who was traveling with me. We had a fun time talking about it and it added to our stories from this pretty epic trip.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? The fun, the playfulness, the oral sex, the location

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? smallish penis, feeling conflicted about whether it was “alright” for me to have casual sex so soon after a breakup

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Yes, in a good way. I realized that what I want right now is fun and sex with another human who respects me. I also realized that I don’t need or want anything more than that at the moment. I was also very surprised at how assertive I was in going for what I wanted and how well it worked out when I did.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? Nope!

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I would like the double standard for women to stop. I’ve had to unlearn some of the stigma that was unconsciously taught to me. I’m learning how to really tap into what I want sexually and not give in to societal pressures and roles. It’s a process though.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Fantastic! I’m so glad this exists.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!