This post is sponsored by The T Bar.
What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 27
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? USA
Highest education received: Some college (not currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Health insurance
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Somewhat
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
The Seven-Month Pursuit
How long ago did this hookup happen? 1 month ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? Short fling
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a year
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He is absolutely gorgeous. He’s a British model and he also plays professional British football. Light brown/dark blonde hair, a perfect body, stunning blue eyes. He is also profoundly Deaf. I discovered him on Facebook in November of 2015 and was absolutely smitten. We had exchanged a few casual messages on Instagram. I drove out to Palm Springs to see him in December (he thought I was already there haha) but he never showed up because we hadn’t really made any real plans. I was taking a crazy chance. Finally got to meet up with him in Italy last month when he was there for the Deaf World Cup and I had decided to sponsor him. I took a 3.5 hour train to Salerno from Rome and met him there.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? So it began on the football field. I came to him game and he had been suspended so I sat with him on the bleachers. This was the first time we had ever met. He had known I was coming as we had been messaging quite often a couple weeks leading up to this. Well, to my surprise, he was overly flirtatious with me, too much really. Way too sexual way too fast, and with about 50 other people standing around who could all see us. I was a bit embarrassed really but also loving every moment of it. He told me to come to his hotel the next day….and I did.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? I arrived to his resort, met him in reception, and followed him back to his room. He wasn’t supposed to bring me back there or to have any association with me really, but we threw caution to the wind. He went to turn the shower on, but I grabbed him and we started making out in the bathroom. We took off our clothes (except for my shirt) and started having sex standing up against the wall. Then we sat on the toilet lid and had sex that way. We moved to the bedroom where we continued to passionately go at it. I remember looking into his eyes and thinking wow I’m finally making love to this man I’ve wanted for so long. I was surprised at how quiet he was; I’ve always heard Deaf people are rather loud in bed. We didn’t talk at all, except for when he told me he had to go to lunch with his teammates and that we could finish after (which we never did because his coach came to the room when we went back and busted us). It ended unfinished but I was completely satisfied.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat
Did you have an orgasm? No, not even close
Did your partner have an orgasm? No
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? Afterwards, I laid by the pool, had way too many cocktails, passed out for a few hours, was woken by one of his teammates, and I never saw him again that day. All of his teammates knew what had happened and they were all joking around with me about it. We had a few good laughs. I saw him the next day and we said our goodbyes. I heard from him a couple times after but then he quit responding and I realized he is a massive player. Was hurt at first but now I don’t care. I don’t regret any of it and I got what I came for even if he did break my heart a little at first.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, Hoping or expecting it would lead to something more, Thought it was an important experience to have
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My friends. They were all shocked that I had finally met him. For a long time it was just an unrealistic dream.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Somewhat
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I finally got the guy I had wanted for so long even if it didn’t lead to anything else.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? How it ended so quickly.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? No
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? Nope!
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I actually hate casual sex and I think people should wait for true love. I know I didn’t but I feel like this was an extreme case and an exception although I still don’t condone it as morally right.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I don’t agree with casual sex so I don’t really support it but I had to post this story somewhere!
You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!