What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 47
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Australia
What country and/or city do you live in? Sydney
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (currently pursuing)
What’s your occupation? NFP Project Manager
What’s your current relationship status? Long term non-monogamous relationship but I’m secondary (not primary) partner
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Sex positive. Advocate for bisexuality (and battling monosexual prejudice).
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? Forty something I think. I don’t keep track.
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
Sex at the Cinema
How long ago did this hookup happen? 2 months
What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status
How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than 6 months
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? J was 6ft 3in, blue eyes, bearded, bald, totally spectacular body (which I wasn’t aware of until I saw him naked, as he wore loose clothing).
We met online and had two lunch dates. He faded after I dodged a kiss at the end of our second date. But then he suddenly reappeared on WhatsApp.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I’d had an extremely frustrating experience of getting into bed for the first time with somebody I really liked (E), who was about to go overseas for six weeks, who went straight to sleep without fucking me! That left me extremely frustrated…especially since my usual lover (P) was overseas for a month. I struggle to cope when more than a week goes by without sex.
Only hours after E left for the airport, J messaged to say that he’d missed our chats and asked if I would like to catch up. Bingo! Someone to fix my sexual frustration!
I told him I had decided that I’d like to take his clothes off when he’d disappeared on me, which I’d found a bit disappointing.
He responded that he’d be delighted if I wanted to take his clothes off some time, but he was also up for coffee, chats, art house movies, etc.
We arranged to meet a couple of nights later for a drink then to see a film at a large cinema nearby.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? I was wearing a spaghetti strap sundress with no bra. The drink was fairly pleasant – he slightly irritated me by badmouthing my home town, but backed off when I noted his poor manners.
We moved on to the film. The cinema was mostly empty so we found a row to ourselves with a couple of people sitting behind us and a couple in front of us, both a few seats to the right.
A little way into the film I crossed my legs and rested one knee on him, which he took as the invitation that it was. He reached across and started caressing my breasts and pinching my nipples through my dress. My nipples went hard and I started getting wet.
Then he pulled a strap down to bare my breast and bent across and started sucking and licking my nearest nipple while he pinched the other one. His beard felt tickly and lovely against my breast and nipples, and made me even more turned on.
After a while of that, his hands slowly slid up under my dress, up the inside of my thighs, then over the top of my underpants. He ran his fingers down between my labia to the entrance of my now dripping wet and engorged cunt. I was dying to be fucked and it felt great when he slid first one, then two fingers into me, and started finger fucking me, rubbing my g-spot (which is my absolute favourite sexual activity). At one point I grabbed his hand and forced his fingers as far into me as they would go, and ground the palm of his hand against my clitoris.
After a while of the finger-fucking, which I was loving, I started to feel a bit selfish, so I reached across to scrape my fingernails down his cock, which was rock hard inside his pants. He helped me undo his belt and jeans and when I pulled down his jocks, his long, straight, fat cock sprang out. Very hot.
I bent over and started giving him head – gently licking and sucking the head of his cock and siding it down my throat as far as it could go with his pants still on. I encircled the base of his cock with my hand and pulled it in the oppposite direction to how my mouth was moving so as to stretch his foreskin back tightly, so my tongue could work around the base of his glans. He tasted nice, with a few salty drops of delicious pre-cum.
I was well into this when the man sitting in front of us turned around and there was some movement behind us too (perhaps the slurping was too noisy?) so we hastily pulled ourselves together and pretended to watch the movie again. He is a police officer and it occurred to me that us getting arrested for indecent exposure probably wouldn’t be helpful for his career!
After a little while we did some kissing. Unfortunately he wasn’t a great kisser (too forceful with his tongue – not taking turns to set the pace, depth, etc)…the hazards of getting so far down the track with someone without kissing them first! But I was still extremely aroused and badly wanted more fucking.
He then whispered to me that perhaps we didn’t need to stay to the end of the film. I agreed and we sneaked out.
We walked hand in hand out of the cinema and I decided it would be the right time to tell him about my long term lover (on the offchance he was nursing a fairy tale fantasy – I hate being deceptive), but that didn’t seem to put him off continuing our evening.
We agreed that he’d head to my place by taxi and I’d cycle home and meet him there. At home I showered quickly then headed to the bedroom, where we rapidly undressed and got onto the bed.
I got him to lie on his front and licked and stroked his back, working my way down to his ass, licked his ass cheeks and lapped his anus with a flat tongue, as well as stroking his legs and licking the insteps of his feet. I got him to lift onto all fours so I could wriggle under him and lick and suck his balls, then suck his hard cock again.
After a while of that he went down on me, then we did some more (mediocre) kissing and I started rubbing the head of his cock against my clitoris, which is often how I orgasm. I started making a lot of noise from that, which turned him on. He then tried to slide his cock down into my cunt, but I stopped him and told him I don’t fuck without a condom, so I grabbed one and pushed him onto his back and rolled the condom over his cock.
I then straddled him and slid his cock into me. It felt wonderful. It was the longest and thickest cock I’d had in me for years. We maintained eye contact while I rode him, which felt right, but also brought into stark relief how little we knew about each other, yet were doing something so intimate.
After a while his cock started to soften, which he blamed on the condom. He asked if he could rub against my clitoris again, which I agreed to, so he pulled off the condom and we lay side by side again while he rubbed my clit with his cock, which made both of us pant with arousal and me start to utter involuntary expletives.
After a few minutes of that he came, squirting across my stomach and chest. I gently licked a bit of come off his cock and tasted some of the semen on my chest. Sexy.
I didn’t orgasm, but I never do with a new lover, so that didn’t worry me at all. We had fucked for a couple of hours all up, and I felt bathed in the fabulous hormonal high that I get from sex.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? After a while lying together we discussed his need to get home so I drove him home.
I didn’t get to bed until almost 2am, making me very tired at work the next day, but he had (temporarily) fixed my raging sexual frustration, so I was glad we’d fucked. My regular lover, P, came home a couple of days later and I went back to him being my primary sexual outlet.
J and I had a vague plan to catch up again a month later but it didn’t come together. We’ve lost touch, which is fine. There wasn’t a strong sense of emotional or intellectual connection – we both just wanted to fuck.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I told one of my best friends that I’d fucked a date in the cinema and she was impressed and envious. Other friends knew I was dating/fucking a few people (there were four in total at that time), but I didn’t go into any specifics about who it was or what we did.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Having sex in a public place. I love taking a risk like that…provided I don’t get caught!
Plus being able to relieve my acute sexual frustration.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Not getting to sleep the night with him. I like to do this, even in the case of one night stands, especially if we have sex again in the morning. For me it’s a nice finish to a good fuck.
It was also a bit disappointing that he found the condom difficult, because I would have liked him to fuck me hard in a variety of positions, and I would have liked to do some anal. But it wasn’t worth risking an STI for that. All in all, I definitely enjoyed myself regardless.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? No. For me, one night stands are good in moderation. If there are too many of them I start to feel a bit icky. I prefer having sex with someone regularly who learns what I like best in bed. But there are times when that option isn’t available!
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? No.
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I am keenly aware that there are a lot of men in my age group who disrespect women if they have casual sex. But these men don’t have the same view of men who have casual sex. That makes me angry, and also wary of sleeping with a man for the first time. I have been slut-shamed more times than I like to recall by men I have had one night stands with (and never by a woman!). I’m relieved when I fuck someone who isn’t messed up about morality and sex.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? It makes me feel normal. I know almost nobody who engages in casual sex, so it’s good to know there are plenty of women my age out there having fun. I find some of the stories a huge turn-on.
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