by Ryan

Gender: male
Age: 24
Race/ethnicity: mixed
Location: New York
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (currently pursuing)
Occupation: Student
Relationship status: long term relationship
Religious affiliation: none
How religious are you? Not at all
Sexual orientation: Gay
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 14
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

Sex with First Chair Violin

How long ago did this hookup happen? 2 years ago

How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? One-night-stand in NYC

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I had only just recently discovered that I was gay and was hooking up with people I met online in the hopes I could find a boyfriend, which I felt was the wrong way to go about such things but I also felt was my only option, as I really wanted a boyfriend. 

I had found a sweet but introverted med student around my age who was into classical music and cooking, but didn’t seem to be that interested in dating, not necessarily because he was busy, steadily practicing for a concerto performance while cramming for midterms, but because he just wasn’t that interested in me. 

As his concerto rolled around he told me I could come to the performance and the after party, but that he had plans to just go home afterwards, alone, as he had to pack for a trip. 

At the concerto I noticed the first chair violin was really sexy, and at the after party he came around to me and would say a couple of words and then just act like he didn’t want to have a conversation and just leave. 

As the night wore on this trend continued until there were only a few people left on the curb deciding how they were going to go home. I was about to walk away, he came over, flagged a cab for us both, and asked me where I was going. 

The cab ride was pretty much silent as my naive and slightly intoxicated self was just bewildered how I seemed to be getting exactly what I had been desiring along with a free ride home. I had worn my favorite pants, shoes, and turtleneck that evening, and was not sure if I could believe I was really as sexy as I had envisioned myself to be.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I was pretty sure first chair instigated it, since he was the one who got us both into a cab, and later asked me what was taking me so long to get my pants off once we were through my front door, but I feel there was some subliminal signal from me that made him act wildly.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We went very passionately at it and did everything excluding things involving the butt hole. Orgasms good.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? None, but also no anal sex.

What were your REASONS for having this hookup? I was turned on by this first chair violinist with a nice body and a nice shirt. Furthermore he wrote the program, which was full of interesting facts about the composer of the concerto, of which now I can’t remember at all. At the party I found out he was also was a lawyer, and I’ve had a thing for lawyers, or anyone who works incredibly hard. I admired first chair and wanted him just for that.

Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? 1-3 margaritas

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I wanted him to be my boyfriend and was nerved that he left while I was taking a shower the next morning. No breakfast? I texted him later and he was surprised I had wanted to have breakfast with him. We met several times afterwards, but just for dinner and conversation. Turns out he had sort of an inferiority complex, as well as a long term boyfriend. However, conversation was fun and competitive.

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I told my best friend and she was amused I was acting out of character.

Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? Yes

Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? No, but I did feel a little bit like a groupie.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I had finally met a guy in the real world instead of online. The best thing is that I felt a level of sexiness and satisfaction I had never experienced before. I felt more like an independent adult, and the ongoing non-sexual contact I have with first chair frees me from sexual frustration.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

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