Current location: New Zealand
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
Occupation: Company Director
Relationship status: Single
Religious affiliation: None
How religious are you? Not at all
Sexual orientation: Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 31
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 3
How long ago did this hookup happen? 22 years
How would you best classify this hookup? One night stand that became FWB
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? The background to this story was that I had recently ended a 2 year relationship. I was really enjoying being single but as a couple of months crept by I was really missing sex. My ex-boyfriend and I had had a very good sex life and I was still quite fond of him, we really only broke up because we were at the stage where things were getting more serious but we didn’t want the same things from life and were young and I knew it wasn’t going to last forever so felt we needed to make that break.
Anyway, a couple of months after we broke up, I had a period of a couple of days where the generalised horny/pining for sex feeling I had became very bad to the point I could only describe it as being lust-crazed. I was dreaming about sex at night, tossing and turning, daydreaming about it, writing stories about my daydreams when I was meant to be working, and generally acting like a slightly crazy person. I was masturbating a lot but it didn’t seem to provide much relief, I was just craving contact with a man. There wasn’t anyone around at the time for me to focus my lust on.
I figured it was particularly bad due to where I was in my cycle, plus it was also the height of summer and the humidity was very very high which always makes people act a little crazy. It was also a full moon, so maybe conditions were perfect to go a bit nuts.
I had never had a one night stand (although had had casual sex in a friendship context) and that hadn’t occurred to me as a possibility.
On this particular day I left work at 5.00 on the dot which was a bit early to leave but I really was incapable of concentrating on my job. I worked as a lawyer, so was wearing a suit and changed into flat shoes to walk home. When I left the office, I walked the complete opposite way to get home. I have no idea why. I was walking along with my headphones in and I suddenly realised I was going the wrong way. I stopped in the middle of the street trying to think whether there was any reason I was going that way, couldn’t think of any, so turned around abruptly to walk the right way home. I was laughing to myself about what a complete idiot I was being. When I turned around I walked right into a guy walking the other way, so sort of laughed, said sorry and kept walking. But not before I had noticed that he was really interesting. He had long strawberry blonde hair (this was the early 90s though so long hair was common), a kind of hippy patterned shirt loose over a t-shirt, loose jeans, one of those hippy bags, but most striking were his very bright green eyes. He was also quite thin. He had laughed with me and as I walked away I felt a very strong feeling of attraction towards him but then thought to myself – he’s a stranger I bumped into on the street, and I’m in a very peculiar mood, so that’s that.
I had walked only about 15 steps though, when I felt a tap on my shoulder, stopped, turned around and it was him. I took my headphones out and he said, quite nervously: I know this is weird, but what would you say if a complete stranger asked you out for a drink? I said: I would say yes, if it was you. And we laughed, and went for a drink.
We had a couple of gin and tonics each at a nearby bar, sitting outside as it was still stinking hot. Right from the start the conversation was incredibly easy. It sounds like a cliché but it was like I’d known him forever. Despite the fact our lives were quite different, we had lots in common. Different as I was a working professional, having just finished university, with a stable and conventional life. He was a real free spirit, just 19 (I was 23), hitchhiking around the place, sleeping rough, earning money picking fruit etc. He had come back into the city to visit his mother, and told me that he was in a car going to the general area of his mother’s place, when he suddenly asked the driver to let him out in the city, just so he could have a walk around. He said if he hadn’t done that on a whim we wouldn’t have met. Similarly if I hadn’t walked the wrong way we wouldn’t have met either. Just a bunch of coincidences but at the time it felt like we were meant to meet up that day.
The stuff in common was more about outlook on life, how we saw the world and felt about it. He had a really delightful openness and positivity about him.
Anyway after a couple of drinks, both of us had no money left. He just generally had very little money and it was just before payday for me. He wasn’t sure how he was going to get to his mother’s house and we were both feeling hungry. I asked him if he would like to walk home with me to my flat and I would cook him some dinner and he said yes. We had a lively conversation all the way to my place and when we got there we were both feeling very hot and a bit parched as it was still incredibly muggy and humid. I got us both a glass of water and we sat out on my deck which had a beautiful view of the city. Next thing I knew it was a few hours later and we’d been talking non-stop and hadn’t had any dinner. By now that big full moon was up in the sky and we started to kiss. We kissed for about an hour I think and it was really wonderful.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? After an hour of kissing I stood up and offered him my hand and said come with me. He said: are you sure? We don’t have to…. but I told him I really wanted to. I took him into my bedroom where we continued to kiss and undressed each other.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? This incredible hookup had 3 parts basically. Part one was wild and frenzied. We started with me riding him, but he was very fit and strong and active and it was a bit like riding a rodeo horse. Amazing feeling. There was a lot of noise and furniture banging and us whooping and laughing and carrying on (poor flatmates). We had nothing but vaginal penetration (no oral) but in every conceivable position and with incredible vigour and enthusiasm. I had never experienced anything like it. Fantastically, he seemed to need only 5 minutes or so after ejaculating to get hard again, so he came about 4 times, a couple of times on me, and we rubbed it into my skin and I rubbed myself all over him as well, just a kind of revelling in the juiciness and fun of it all. After about 2 hours of this, we were lying utterly exhausted side by side with all the windows wide open and a breeze coming in and the moon shining on our bodies. We looked at each other and laughed because we were absolutely soaking wet and sticky from head to foot. The humidity had caused both of us to sweat like we’d been out for a run. My hair was so wet it looked like I’d been under a hose.
By now it was almost midnight and we were both still hot and flushed. I suggested we take a shower so we went into the bathroom for part 2 of the hookup. Part 2 was basically a very sensuous and long shower washing each other then having sex again, from behind up against the shower wall, then with him lifting me up onto him standing, and finally, exhausted, kind of lying on the bottom of the shower stall. Then the hot water ran out, so we turned the shower off and went back to my room, feeling much much cooler. Of course my flatmates now hated me even more than before.
Finally, in part 3 of the hookup, which was the long period between about 2.00 am and 6.00 am, we had a gentle slow time. He gave me an utterly gorgeous and long full body massage with oil, then he read me some of his poetry, then he spotted I had a flute, so asked me to play that for him. (sorry again flatmates). Then we made love a couple of times. I have to call it that because it was slow and gentle and he looked into my eyes the whole time and kissed me all over.
I don’t know how many times he came but it seemed like a lot. I would’ve thought at least 8, maybe more? he was 19. I also came a lot.
Around 6.00 am he was suddenly extremely exhausted and wanted to go to sleep. Fair enough. I felt really wide awake though, a little hyper even, and also thought there was little point going to sleep when I was going to have to get up at 7.00 to go to work. He told me that one (hippy?) theory is that ejaculation by the man into the woman is a transference of energy, so that the man gets more and more tired with each time and the woman gets more and more energy. I don’t know if it’s true but I felt utterly amazing. I told him to have a sleep and to let himself out to go and see his mother when he woke up. I got up and got ready for work and was there early. I also wanted to leave early so I wouldn’t have to face my flatmates. I had a great day at work, feeling focused and productive and couldn’t believe I’d had no sleep. It felt like I had had exactly what I needed.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? I was on the pill. We took no precautions regarding STIs and didn’t discuss it.
What were your REASONS for having this hookup? Lust combined with a strong connection with a stranger.
Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? 2 gin and tonics. Did not feel drunk at all.
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I felt absolutely amazing and thrilled that something like this could happen. It felt like a dream come true. My feelings about him were complicated. The experience had been so good and so magical, that of course I wanted to repeat it and to see him. I knew though that he was not someone I could have a conventional relationship with. It wouldn’t suit him, and he didn’t fit into my existing life at all. It did make me think long and hard about how to combine the various parts of yourself into a life. What it means to choose paths in life and how to stay true to yourself while doing that. Ultimately I hoped that he was someone I would be able to stay in touch with on some level because we had shared something. I also hoped we might hookup again.
Because this happened 22 years ago, I can say that we did indeed hookup again, and he became a friend with benefits. He would turn up every now and then, and if I was single, we would have sex, and if I was in a relationship when he turned up, we would just go out for lunch and have long talks about life and things. He was a great guy. This arrangement ended a few years later though, which I will talk about in another story about our last ever hookup, which I will call ‘karma’.
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? There was quite the chat about it in my flat. There were 3 other girls there. One was horrified, disgusted and quite annoyed about it. The other 2 found it funny, but also thought it was a bit weird to have brought a complete stranger home, who I met on the street.
I didn’t tell anyone else.
Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? Yes and yes.
Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? NO, never.
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? The best: a truly magical experience that I still get enjoyment out of thinking about and remembering today.
This hookup made me realise it is worth taking chances sometimes and doing something that seems a bit crazy.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
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