College FWB

by Savannah

Gender: Female
Age: 19
Race/ethnicity: Hispanic
Location: Texas
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
Occupation: Student
Relationship status: Single
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
Sexual orientation: Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? Four
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? Zero

College FWB

How long ago did this hookup happen? A Year and a Half ago.

How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? Friends-With-Benefits

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? It was my first semester in college, I had just turned 18 and it was only a month into the first semester. I was at the library late at night working on a paper and smoking some cigarettes. A guy came out of the library and began talking to someone near me. I saw him looking at me, and he saw me looking at him. After a while he came over and asked for a cigarette. He sat down and we began talking about small things. He later asked me if I smoked weed, and I went to his car with him. We smoked and  drove around, nothing major. At the time I had a boyfriend of two years whom I was committed to but I was slowly growing further apart from him. I learned that his name was Adrian and he was 7 years older than me (25). He was very suave and I wasn’t sure if he was trying to pursue me or we were just friends.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We would hang out about every other day. Smoke, eat, and drink seemed to be our daily routine. I had expressed to him my discontent of my at-the-time boyfriend and he said I should break up with him. After that discussion we went back to my apartment where he laid down next to me and started kissing my neck. He asked how I felt about it and I said that I wasn’t comfortable because I had a boyfriend. He said it was okay because I was breaking up with him anyways, so I let him continue. My previous boyfriend was the only person that I had any type of sexual encounter with.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? During the hook ups he would kiss me all over, which I loved. He was much more sensual than my first sexual partner, I felt like having an orgasm when he would kiss my neck. His dick was extremely big, and I was fairly tight considering my lack of sexual experience compared to his. I performed oral on him and he did the same. We had sex a few times but it was not very good. It was very difficult to enjoy the sex because of his large size. We had to go very slow and not deep at all. Although I was not a virgin, I still bled. I don’t think either of us had had an orgasm. The foreplay was great, just not the actual sex.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? We used condoms every time we had vaginal intercourse but no protection for oral.

What were your REASONS for having this hookup? My reason was that it was my first semester in college and I wanted to experience something that I had never experienced before, having sex without feelings or with no purpose but pleasure, no love.

Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? Yes, both. Quite a bit.

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? After the hookups I felt a little dirty. I liked the idea of meeting someone just for the purpose of sex but I did not feel any sense of gratification afterwards. He just left and I would sleep. I stopped talking to him soon after and we have never seen each other or spoke again. I felt slightly taken advantage of because of my age and inexperience.

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I talked to a male friend of mine about it. He was disappointed that I had had sex with someone that carelessly he was also surprised how much older he was than me.

Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? Yes, for both.

Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? I do not regret the hookup however I wish it was more emotionally and physically satisfying. I do regret cheating on my boyfriend, although I broke up with him the next day after the hookup. I had never wanted to end a relationship that way.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? The best the about the hookup was the feeling of sexual freedom I had overcome. I had finally recognized myself as a sexual being. The worst part was the lack of emotion and no/very little sexual pleasure.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Somewhat negative

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