This post is sponsored by The T Bar.
What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 23
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Wellington
Highest education received: High school diploma
What’s your occupation? Student
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 6
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 1
Fancy Hotel Night With Spa Bath
How long ago did this hookup happen? A Week
What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status
How would you best classify this hookup? Friends-with-benefits
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than 6 months
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? In typical fashion I matched with him on Tinder and started chatting, we arranged to meetup. I was already a little skeptical on it going well as he’d been a little interrogating like when chatting, which is to be expected when first chatting to someone, but this was a little bit more intense than i’d with previous Tinder conversations mixed with him not being that keen on my tattoos or getting more which made me quite nervous to meet him as I didn’t think we’d connect or mesh very well. Which we didn’t alot, it was quite an awkward start to the evening with me being quite late and not that keen on playing pool but the evening did get better from dinner and we ended up going on two more dates, but decided we were too different for anything more and decided to be friends with benefits as despite our very different personalities we had great sexual chemistry and I was quite attracted to him so I didn’t mind trying friends with benefits even though I was sure it would’t work well.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? Despite a slightly tumultuous few months mainly due to me being so indecisive, not coping well with friends with benefits, I had always been better at a hookup/one-night stand, as at least you knew where you stood more and didn’t try to awkwardly be friends. But despite all this we were still in contact, we both wanted fun, crazy sex so I suggested a hotel night as I thought it would be better there especially with his walls being abit thin at his place, and abit awkward for me going there since the time one of his flatmates had drunkenly called me a bitch.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? It was an amazing room in a very fancy hotel but I knew the night was going to be very different to what we had expected when I discovered I had my period, which wasn’t too bad just very painful and I was pretty tired and in a migraine because of it so it wasn’t going to be the crazy, experimental with sex toys and stuff like we’d wanted.
It was still a very good weekend though, with a few new things, lots of sex and crazy orgasms. From the time he arrived there was alot of making out, neck kissing while testing out the very comfortable hotel bed. We had a few spa baths that night, one trying out best positions to sit or lie in the spa bath while making out, it was too difficult trying to have sex in it but there was a great moment of me sitting on the edge it while he used my vibrator on me between fingering me and putting my nipples in his mouth which was slightly painful but still felt really great. We then had a shower and I tried to rest a little with my migraine unfortunately getting worse. We weren’t that keen on getting any dinner or food at the hotel so he ordered and got pizza. We then went and got cidar and had a bubble spa bath, which was very slippery but definitely one of the highlights of the weekend with about two hours in the spa bath, with cidar, a pretty cheesy but good music playlist and lots of making out, grinding and fingering. It was pretty intimate but still pretty awesome. We had a shower after with more making out and an interesting but very pleasurable experience when he sat on the floor of the shower with me faced towards the wall of the shower with him fingering me while pulling my hair backwards, which definitely gave me quite the orgasm and had me screaming abit.
The next morning was just as good and fun. There was no trying to sleep in the morning, before he was kissing my neck, removing the very little clothes I did have on and kissing around my boobs and sucking my nipples, which as usual always made me start to moan loudly with it being far more arousing and sensitive having both my nipples pierced. We then tried missionary, which for some reason I always seemed to have the most orgasms like that with him, which I had one while typically moaning very loudly and digging my nails into his back and his hands when he had my arms pinned above my head, he then moved my legs towards the edge of the bed for the wheelbarrow position, which felt amazing, slightly painful with my period but definately better feeling him deeper inside me, and was definately better and hotter when he moved my body back towards the middle of the bed and pushed my legs right up by his head which was painful and pleasurable at the same time, but definitely made me scream alot and orgasm. Just to add to more new sexual experiences he also had me lie on my stomach and moving my arms to behind my back, while he fingered me, kissed my neck and pulled my hair which was really interesting especially when he put the blindfold on me during it, which that felt a little strange but very hot.
We then went to the awesome hotel buffet breakfast, and there was alot of cuddling, making out and trying out the hotel pool and spa before checking out in the afternoon. I was a little emotional when leaving which was mainly due to having to leave the hotel and I was so sure it would be the last awesome night/morning of sex with him just with it starting to get complicated, despite the sex being so great especially with him being so attentive to my body and super sensual.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We’re two completely different people that want different things, so I knew friends with benefits wasn’t going to last much longer with him especially after such an intimate weekend at the hotel and I was starting to realize despite being so different I was starting to get feelings for him but I knew he was so determined we were too different to be more so after a few days of thinking about it I sent him a text that I couldn’t continue things which he agreed with and we both said bye. Which I hoped was for the best despite liking him, I knew he wasn’t interested in more than me being just there for fun, crazy sex.
How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? A couple of close friends, they weren’t too pleased as they didn’t really like him, One had met him and thought we weren’t suited even just for sex and would get hurt.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Mixed (Some positive, some negative)
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Having gotten the awesome fancy room with the spa bath and basically the whole evening despite the worst timing of having had my period, but the pizza, cidar and spa bath that evening was awesome, despite it being more intimate than I thought it was going to be but resulted in a very good time there at the hotel.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Just having had my period really, made things a little more painful which did make a good few days after, and the grumpiness and tiredness wasn’t so great from me, but overall was a good weekend.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? That particular weekend didn’t change the way I think about casual sex or me, but it did slightly make things more complicated and awkward as it was so intimate for something that was just sex. For me generally I don’t think friends with benefits is for me, as it was a great experience and fun that I definitely don’t regret but definitely gets complicated despite you thinking it might not, that no matter how guarded or different the person is you can still start to get feelings and slightly hurt when it ends, especially if you start to see them as an actual friend it’s a little painful for a few days but life moves on.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I think casual sex is great and wish society was more open and less judgmental towards it, it can depend on the person but is generally great having a no strings attached, fun, experimental type thing. I’m just not so sure or convinced on friends with benefits, as it depends on the people, what you have arranged and how long it goes on for but it definitely can get messy and a little painful when you finally end it, as no matter how great the sex can be it’s not worth it especially for me putting your energy into something so fake (on their part) and exhausting when you have to hold yourself back so you don’t get attached.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I think it’s great.
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