First Affair



What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 75
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Australia
What country and/or city do you live in? Sydney
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? Retired
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Married homosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? Lost count
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? two

First Affair

How long ago did this hookup happen? 15 years

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? Friends-with-benefits

How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was fit, well proportioned and handsome, 22 years my junior, and married. We met through a mutual friend who I had met a little earlier in a gay sauna while away on a business trip. After my earlier homosexual experiences (see previous stories) I discovered gay bathhouses during another business trip to UK. As I travelled away from home frequently I found myself indulging more and more in such visits which provided a safe, anonymous place in which to express my sexuality. At the same, having regular marital sex, I was anxious about STDs and limited my activities to mainly watching, frotting and mutual masturbation – I nearly freaked the first time a man sucked my cock! On this occasion I walked past a room where an attractive older man was lying naked. I joined him, enjoyed some bodily contact, learned that he too was married and had a large circle of other married men with similar tendencies, mentioning one younger man in particular, Geoff, who was only interested in older men. We agreed to meet up again when I was next in the city and he would introduce us.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? A month later, on a visit, I contacted him and he invited me to lunch with Geoff and another friend. He introduced us, we shook hands, made eye contact and the chemistry was immediate: it was one of those scarcely believable encounters of love at first sight. Over lunch, we agree to all repair to a local bathhouse. My excitement was excruciating, like nothing I had experienced since adolescence and falling in love with another boy when I was 16. The four of us undressed and took a private room in the sauna.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? Geoff and I embraced immediately and our bodies stayed locked together for the next two hours while we made out multiple times and developed an immediate bond based on shared interests, feelings, experiences. The limited sex we had was almost secondary to the feelings that developed between us, enjoyable as it was. It was mainly full body contact, embracing, kissing, mutual masturbation but for the first time for both of us, we sucked each others’ cocks (but did not swallow).

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I felt elated, wonderful, that extraordinary experience of love at first sight.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, Hoping or expecting it would lead to something more, Making new friends

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? The man who introduced us

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Mixed (Some positive, some negative)

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I had fallen in love with another man.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Both feeling somewhat guilty about family.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Yes, very much. Much more was involved than satisfying lust.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? It was the beginning of a very long intimate affair and friendship.

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? It has led to an extraordinary feeling of satisfaction in coming to terms with my sexuality

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!