What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 37
What’s your race/ethnicity? Southeast Asian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? Canada
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? IT
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Hindu
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 5-7
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 1
How long ago did this hookup happen? 2003-2004
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? Friends-with-benefits
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than 6 months
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? A is originally from Poland. She came here as an international student. She has dirty blond hair, is of average height, has a body to die for, always smelled incredible, and has blue eyes. She is a goddess!
I met her in undergrad as she used to work at a coffee shop on campus. She was a friend of another friend. We ran into each other at the same coffee shop at a live music event. We were both crushing for each other hard. She had a thing for brown skin. I had a thing for white skin. It really was sexual lust at its best.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? After that night, we were exchanging emails and the conversation was getting very sexual very fast. We exchanged numbers. She called me like 3 times when I wasn’t home one day and left messages. My roommate was teasing me that ‘someone’ was really trying to get a hold of me. I used to work at the university help desk. A called me saying she was having issues with her PC at home and asked if I could help her. I walked through some steps. She said it still wasn’t working. So I offered to come by and take a look at it.
I went to her place after my shift. She opened the door, wearing jeans and a big sweater. We hugged and went straight to her room where her PC was. 5-10 mins later, the issue was resolved. We both wanted something quick to eat, so we snacked on some pizza slices. I guess we were both nervous and didn’t really know how to initiate things. We just needed an excuse to come close to each other. We started looking at some of her family pics while we sat on the couch talking. Later, she started giving me a massage. After two minutes, I told her to turn around, and I started rubbing her shoulders and back. I then moved her hair away to start rubbing her neck. She started moaning gently. I couldnt hold myself any longer and decided to kiss her neck deeply.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We were on from that point! I kissed her neck for a couple of minutes before we both got up and started making out hard. Both of our hands were exploring each other’s bodies. All of our clothes came off except our underwear. I lifted her up and pressed her against the wall while we were kissing each other. I got tired after a couple of minutes of doing that though, so I put her down, lifted her in both my arms and took her to the bedroom. There, I threw her on the bed on top of the blanket. Both of our underwear came off as soon as we were under the blanket. This was only the second girl I had been with so I was taking my time. I sucked on her tits for a long time. They were perfect. She was getting worked up. She put both of her hands on my heads and pushed me down. This was the first I was going down on a girl, but I was ready for anything. I licked her pussy for a few minutes, but I didn’t enjoy it too too much.
I came back up to kiss her again, she was a bit hesitant and said: “you want me to kiss myself?” I didn’t wait for an answer and kissed her. My cock was raging by this time and she was stroking it hard. I was loving the sight of her stroking me and was barely being able to contain my bulge in her hands. She was also a loud moaner. She kept saying my name repeatedly and writhing in pleasure. I couldnt take it anymore and came hard in her hands before I collapsed on top of her. She went to the bathroom to freshen up and came back smelling even better. I was ready for round two. I starting finger blasting her like there was no tomorrow. Again, she was loving it. She must have come multiple times.
We both passed out after that. I must have woken up 3-4 times at night and I would finger her pussy hardcore and come on her. We didnt have a condom and while she was literally begging me to fuck her raw, I just couldnt risk it. 15-16 yrs after, my single biggest regret of my life that I didnt fuck her, but what an experience it was.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We met one more time at her house. This time, I actually had a condom on me, but she was acting a bit cold. Perhaps she was pissed that I didn’t fuck her the last time.
We both got busy after that and barely saw each other for a couple of years. I ran into her one day randomly while I was working in a computer lab. We went to the basement where there was no one and made out, but that was the last I saw her.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) No penetrative sex happened
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Hoping or expecting it would lead to something more, Thought it was an important experience to have, To feel better about myself, To feel more desirable, To feel more confident, To cheer myself up, I was feeling lonely, Power / Dominance
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Couple of friends at university. High fives.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How good she smelled and how eager was she to have me inside her.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? That I didn’t fuck her.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? It made me more confident about myself.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? I started talking to her recently on FB. She has since left Canada. I have a feeling that if she was local, we would have definitely gotten together one more time to fix the ‘mistakes’ of the past.
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? It is good. People should engage in consensual sex as much as possible.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Awesome.
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