What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 46
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (currently pursuing)
What’s your occupation? Military
What’s your current relationship status? In a serious relationship (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? Maybe 10 or so
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
How long ago did this hookup happen? About 5 years
What was your relationship status at the time? In a relationship (monogamous)
How would you best classify this hookup? Fuck-buddies / Booty call
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a year
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He’s a tall, skinny but muscular, kind of goofy guy, but still cute. We were in the same National Guard unit and had only casually hung out and chatted during drill weekends.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We were in Michigan doing our 2 week summer training, so there was plenty of down time and boredom. The 2 of us had been waiting in a truck for something. We drove back to the barracks and I kept thinking about how easy it would be to hook up. I kinda had the feeling he was interested too, so I sent him a text saying we should sneak off. I was in a relationship, but was curious about cheating because I had never done that before. He answered, and we came up with a loose plan. He went to the PX and got some vodka, then asked me to get condoms because he was too nervous. So I went to the PX, and we met in a little metal shack that I’m pretty sure had been part of an internment camp.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? He was already hard when I got there, and pretty well endowed. He bent me over a table with his army shorts around his ankles. Neither one of us took our shoes off or even kissed. Then he picked me up, flipped me over, fucked me across the table and finished. I remember thinking, this is what cheating is and I liked it.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat
Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We got dressed and left one at a time so it wasn’t suspicious. He barely talked to me for the rest of the time. Eventually we started talking and texting again and he admitted that he had felt really guilty. He had just gotten married about a month before this happened. We still meet up and fuck every once in a while, once even when his wife was pregnant. They’re separated now, but not because of the hook ups.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Thought it was an important experience to have
How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Somewhat
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? A few girlfriends, they thought it was funny.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Neutral
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Sex and life experience.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? I mainly felt bad because he felt guilty about it. Also it’s pretty shitty of me because I knew he was married and I was committed too.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? It’s made me more open to enjoying other partners.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? It’s pretty interesting.
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