J – September



What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 30
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? USA
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your current relationship status? Single
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Queer
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 60+
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

J – September

How long ago did this hookup happen? Two days ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? Fuck-buddies

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than 6 months

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? We met on Tinder in July when I decided to start dating/having sex again. He lives forty minutes away and works 100+ hours a week. We talked on the phone a few times before I drove out to his place to spend the night. I like him and we’re friends. Neither one of us has any expectation beyond that. I’ve seen him once a week or every two weeks since then.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I knew we’d be having sex. We are both open and honest about enjoying sex and wanting to have a lot of it. We started watching a movie and he began touching me. Caressing slowly turned into fondling and groping.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? I went down on him for a while to start out with. After a while, he wanted to fuck me in the ass like he usually does, and I was happy to. He removed my clothes and started slow, but then he fucked me harder. It felt so good and I came multiple times. Eventually, he came in me (in the condom). He’s a good lover. He is dirty and rough too, which is just the way I like it.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We went to bed, but I had troubling sleeping. I kept waking up thinking about another partner.

No changed feelings about the last encounter and I plan on doing it again soon. I enjoy his company.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms, Birth control pill / patch / ring / injection / implant, IUD (Intrauterine device), Discussed STI testing history

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, To cheer myself up, I was feeling lonely, Making new friends

How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it

What substances did you consume? Marijuana, hashish

How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Marijuana, hashish

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? NA

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I’m always intrigued that he goes for my ass as it’s surprising. Also that he makes me cum multiple times.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? He hasn’t washed his sheets in ages as he had no time to.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? No

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I started having casual sex consistently four years ago. In racking up sexual partners, I never felt slut-shamed by anyone except me: an inner voice that, since then, has been slowly replaced by sex-positive, self-awareness. For me, identifying my motivations and being intentional and safe about partners has made me feel more secure about my lifestyle choices. Because I did not grow up with ordinary people who modeled this life, I’d love to hear more about those who partake.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Awesome! An enthusiastic supporter. (Heard about it on the manwhore podcast).

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!