What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 62
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? SF bay area, California
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? teacher
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Publicly hetero, closeted gay/bi
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 50?
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
Two married guys in broad daylight
How long ago did this hookup happen? 6 months ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status
How would you best classify this hookup? Fuck-buddies / Booty call
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a month
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was Asian, about my age, also married to a woman, also closeted gay/bisexual. We met online on a hookup site, chatted for a long time, then met on bicycles one Saturday. Both of us were cyclists, and a couple weeks before the hookup, we met and cycled around a bit. We stopped at one point in a secluded place and he stuck his hands in my jersey and massaged my pecs. I massaged his penis from outside his cycling shorts. But that was all we did that first time. The hookup was two weeks later.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? Two weeks after we first met, we arranged to go cycling together again. We didn’t really plan on what we would do, other than bike together. But we both were horny as hell. I guess I instigated it, by inviting him to go riding again.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? This time we rode up a popular cycling hill to where it dead ended and turned into a trail. The trail was used by trail bikers, but we both had road bikes. Still, we decided to ride up the trail a bit. The trail seemed pretty empty that day. We only encountered one couple riding in the other direction. Eventually, we stopped and laid our bikes down at the side of the trail. He started massaging my pecs, which he said he found really sexy. I rubbed my hands up and down his legs, which were completely smooth and hairless (as many Asians are), then started to rub his cock inside his biking shorts. He was getting really excited (as was I) and eventually pulled down his shorts to let his cock spring free. It was not large, maybe 5 1/2 inches, but pretty fat. I got down on my knees and started to suck it. Mind you, we were doing this right on the trail, in broad daylight! We were listening and watching for other people coming, but it was extremely risky. Who knows if we could have gotten his shorts back up in time, should we hear someone. It was very exciting to both of us, needless to say. My heart was pounding like mad, and he was incredibly hard. Well after just a few minutes, he said he was about to cum. I said, fine, and put his cock back into my mouth. This just about set him off. In fact it did — he exploded in my mouth. He was a reasonably big cummer, but I swallowed it all. Then we heard something down the trail and he quickly pulled up his shorts. Just in time, because a man and woman came around the corner on their trail bikes. The woman just biked by, but the guy looked at us (and our bikes lying next to the trail) rather quizzically. I know he was wondering what we had been doing, and who knows, he might have noticed that my hair was messed up and I was shaking from the fear of being caught. So maybe he guessed. Anyway, at that point, having almost been caught in the act (had they come along about 10 seconds earlier!), we didn’t dare do anything more. We got back on our bikes and rode down the hill, said goodbye and parted ways.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? Even though I didn’t have an orgasm, I found it very satisfying to have gotten him to have one, and to have swallowed all his cum. The rest of the day, once I got home, I kept thinking about what we had done and how crazy-risky it was to do it on a public trail in bright sunshine. The thought of getting caught scared me but also made me hard just thinking about it. I felt the same way the next day, and even now, as I write this description of the hookup, it makes me feel horny and I want to do it again. But I don’t think I’d risk it quite so publicly.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) No penetrative sex happened
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Learning new things, experimenting
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I have never spoken to anyone else about this hookup (or any other gay hookup I have had–there have been many).
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? It was one of the most exciting, exhilarating sexual experiences I’ve had, even though he came quickly and I didn’t cum at all. The risk, and the fact that we were almost caught in the act, made it exhilarating.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Well, of course it was too brief, but that is kind of in the nature of such a risky act.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I am a very careful, discreet guy, which is why I’ve been able to have a hidden gay sex life without anyone suspecting that I’m anything less than straight.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? My wife and I mostly stopped having sex (her choice) about 15 years ago. Since then we have had sex together maybe once a year. So I have indulged my gay urges and meet guys on the side (on the down low, as they say). Part of me wishes this part of me could be public, and that my wife knew about it and accepted it/me for what I am. But I don’t dare tell her.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Cool.
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