What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 29
What’s your race/ethnicity? Hispanic / Latino/a
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? USA
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your current relationship status? Dating casually
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 6
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 1
Virgin No More
How long ago did this hookup happen? Almost a year ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? Fuck-buddies / Booty call
How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? Cute af, Latino, 5’9, had been talking on Tinder for like 2 days then switched to texting and made plans to meet up that night. Met at a bar, got a couple of drinks, and then I invited him back to my place. I was very horny and was expecting it to happen; I wanted to lose my virginity to him.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We were kissing at the bar and I knew how the night was going to end.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? As soon as we got to my apartment we started making out. We made out for a while and then moved it to my bedroom. He started fingering me and then fell asleep. He was pretty drunk. Then at 5 in the morning, he woke me up and we started having sex. I was a virgin so it was a pretty intense experience for me. It kind of hurt but the pleasure outweighed the pain. He was a very good lover, he came but I didn’t. Then we went back to sleep. A couple of hours later the maintenance man came in so to fix something in my apartment so we had to rush out of bed and put some clothes on. He realized he missed setting his alarm and was too late to make it into work. So he stayed and hung out with me. After breakfast and wake and bake, we had sex again. He went down on me, then made me orgasm by fingering me, and then fucked me again and came all over my breasts.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? He left that afternoon like around 2 pm. I texted him the next day because he forgot something at my place. We made plans to hang out over the weekend. My expectations back then were I wanted to see where it goes. I started crushing on him. Fast forward almost a year later and I am still seeing him but he has a girlfriend (back with his ex). I’m his “side” and I have an emotional attachment to him and wish he were mine. We only have sex/see each other once or twice a month but text regularly.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Withdrawal
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Learning new things, experimenting, Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection, To feel better about myself, To feel more desirable, To feel more confident, Submission / Relinquishing power
How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Close friends. Some were surprised some really excited.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Mixed (Some positive, some negative)
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Somewhat
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I felt extremely comfortable. It was on my terms and it didn’t hurt as much as I thought it would. That I have a fuck buddy who I really like.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? He is my only partner that is not a one-night stand. I have become emotionally attached to him and I haven’t been able to let him go and this relationship has gone on a lot longer than I anticipated…
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Yes.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? He’s the best I’ve ever had
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I think casual sex can be very empowering.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I love it!
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