A Friend’s Friend



What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 18
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Netherlands, Utrecht
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Waitress
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Probably pretty pervert-ish. Or at least extremely dirty-minded
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 9-11
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? None

A friend’s friend

How long ago did this hookup happen? 3 months ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was actually younger than me. He was quite tall, and the cutest blue eyes ever and dark-ish hair. I didn’t know him very well at all. We had a mutual friend and went clubbing with 5/6 other people that night. Before the hookup happened I already thought he was super cute and since I didnt really know him, I was interested.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? The hookup kinda begun that night. We went to a bar before going out and he was sitting next to me and we just started talking, away from the rest and I was quite interested. As soon as we got at the club (and a few – read: a lot – of beers later) we started making out in the middle of the dance floor and damn what a good kisser he was. I think the alcohol eased us to just break the tension, because we obviously both felt it. There was no planning involved and none of us really made the first move, we just did it.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? During the hookup we did both oral and vaginal. That’s kinda special because I normally don’t do oral with one night stands, but something felt sorta different. He only had a girlfriend once and they just broke up so he wasn’t very experienced. That was kinda hot, don’t know why. It felt special. He was very sweet and respectful and he listened well to what I wanted to do and what positions to take. He was quite a good lover though, I learned that the amount of bed partners says nothing about the quality of the sex. We did it multiple times that night and that morning, too. We talked about that night and just life in general. It was very chill. That’s how it ended, too. I just stayed the night and he made us breakfast that morning. We talked a little and then eventually I left in the afternoon. No hard feelings.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? Nothing really happened. I haven’t seen him since, but we’re Facebook friends and like each other’s stuff. I didn’t really expect anything after it. I mean, he was cute and sweet and a one in a million guy, but i wasn’t planning on dating this guy. If he showed interest it’s nice, but i’m not expecting anything nor make the first move. I still think he’s a cute and sweet guy but I don’t have any feelings for him.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Birth control pill / patch / ring / injection / implant, Discussed STI testing history

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), To cheer myself up

How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did you consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish

How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Our mutual friend and I know the people that went clubbing with us all know it, because we left together.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? That it felt completely natural. Most of the time the guys are older and way more experienced than me and I feel a bit insecure. This time we both were at the same level and we were super relaxed and confident.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? I knocked over his lamp while doing Cowgirl and apparently woke up his flatmates. That was awkward.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? A bit. I found out that I dont’t really have a ‘type’ because he wasn’t my type at all but it was the best one night stand i’ve experienced so far. Also, quantity and quality are not related.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? Only that I would definitely do it again if I had the chance.

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I think casual sex is a great thing and societies opinion of it sucks. I’ve had quite a few one night stands and they’re great. Why would it only be socially acceptable for men to go out and fuck around, but if a girl does it she’s a slut and should be ashamed of herself. That’s also the change I want to see; for people not to male such a big deal of something so natural as sex. We all know we all want it, so why only call it a positieve thing to do for men? Women should be able to have sex whenever they want with who they want without being called names or ashamed.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Very good. This needs some awareness and I think this will definitely help.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!