Am I A Bad Person?



What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 19
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? England
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Student
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 28
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? None

Am I A Bad Person?

How long ago did this hookup happen? Last night

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I went to a club with a girl friend and met some of her old high school friends there, one of them was very attractive, quite short, brown hair, muscly build and big juicy lips and a jawline, way out of my league.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We were just dancing as a 4 in the club and my friend was getting friendly with one of the guys, so I was dancing with the other, he went in for a kiss, I only just met him 5 minutes before.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We went the full way, had sex, and I gave him oral. I think he enjoyed being controlled by me when I was on top, the sex was very passionate and he seemed to be into, spanking, biting, choking and all that which I dig. He seemed like a nice guy but my friend has warned me saying he’s not like what he seems, he’s recently come out of a 3 year relationship and will apparently “kiss anyone” which helped my self esteem. The sex lasted 20/30 minutes all in all and straighter after he was like “this is where I’d normally leave but I can’t because our friends are also having sex next door” which made me feel rubbish about myself, but he just rolled over and fell asleep straight away anyway.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat

Did you have an orgasm? No, not even close

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I didn’t sleep at all during the night, I never tend to sleep when I have a guy in my bed I don’t know why but it puts me on edge, the next day he woke up, got up and put all his clothes on, I was awake but pretended to be asleep because I didn’t want the awkwardness of having to talk. He then went into the kitchen to meet our friends, we barely spoke I felt very embarrassed and awkward because I knew he’d just deny everything if I mentioned it. It made me feel rubbish the next day as I had a hangover and had the regret of having a one night stand with my best friends old friend.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Birth control pill / patch / ring / injection / implant

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Intoxication, To feel more confident, To cheer myself up, I was feeling lonely, Power / Dominance, Making new friends, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it

How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did you consume? Alcohol

How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Somewhat

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react?

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively negative

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? A little bit

Why do you regret this hookup? I jut feel like we shouldn’t of invited them back to mine, it would never of happened if they hadn’t come back, they came back here and I genuinely had no idea it was going to happen, I was so attracted to him but knew he was way too good for me looks wise.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? The sex was good and enjoyable

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? The way he acted afterwards, he denied the fact anything happened

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? No, I have a lot of casual sex, but it hasn’t changed my opinion on anything, after all my hookups I learn something new every time

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Somewhat negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I have a lot of casual sex, I really enjoy it and I am safe so why not? But sometimes I do have regrets and have down days where I feel crap about myself so somehow I feel it’s affecting my mental health.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I love this!

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!