Bad Decision



What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 43
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? USA
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? Property Management
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 4
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

Bad Decision

How long ago did this hookup happen? 4 months

What was your relationship status at the time? Engaged/Married (monogamous)

How would you best classify this hookup? Short fling

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was a very handsome younger guy who I had met a couple of days earlier at a conference I was attending. I was somewhat attracted to him before the hookup but being married, I didn’t plan for anything to happen.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We had attended a dinner meeting at the conference we were attending. Afterward he invited me to go for a couple of drinks and I was enjoying his company so I accepted. I am not a drinker so I got pretty tipsy after a few drinks. What happened next was not planned at all as I ended up going back to his room with him.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? Once we got to his room, we kissed a few times. I had on a low cut cocktail dress. While we were kissing, he ran his hand down inside and began playing with my tits which are very sensitive and gets me aroused with little effort. The next thing I knew we were on the bed kissing more passionately and he went up my dress and started foreplay. I was enjoying it to say the least but told him we he knew couldn’t do anything because I was married. He just continued the foreplay getting me so aroused. I was embarrassed at how messy he had gotten me. He stopped and started to get his penis so I told him we couldn’t do anything because I wasn’t on any kind of birth control expecting and hoping he would say he had a condom because I didn’ t want to stop. By that time, he had gotten himself out rolled over between my legs and in me he went. He had no more than gotten in me before I had an orgasm so I told him we should stop. He asked if I wasn’t enjoying it. I told him that I was and that was why we should stop. Before I could say another thing, I felt him coming and I had another orgasm as he filled me up with more than enough to do the job.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We spent time talking. I told him it had been some time since i had had orgasms like that and was afraid because it was the time of the month that I must be very fertile. He joked saying it would be something to get a married women in bed and knock her up too. I told him that wasn’t funny since my husband had been fixed making it hard for me to explain. We parted after talking for a while. I enjoyed the experience very much.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None

What were your motives for this hookup? Attraction to partner(s), Intoxication

How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did you consume? Alcohol

How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but didn’t give a ‘no’

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My sister is the only person that knows about the affair.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Mixed (Some positive, some negative)

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Somewhat

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Somewhat

Why do you regret this hookup? As luck would have it, he did get me pregnant. I confided in my sister and we arranged a short vacation so I could have a abortion.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? The sex was awesome.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Getting pregnant.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Not really

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? No

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? It was very out of character for me to have done this. However, I do not regret the experience.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Interesting

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!